Don't Want To Be Wrong Here - Dinner Plus Drinks #132

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Sometimes. In the history of mankind, it comes to a point that nihilism is all that is logical in the face of despair and the gray reality of the world. But then a champion arises and inspires you out of your despair. And that, my friends, is the greatness of Joey Chestnut. What man can eat 63 hot dogs and buns? Mind you, the bun is the tricky part. Any man could eat 40 hot dogs. A true champion. 63, but the greatest champion. 63 and a bun. And not only eat the hot dogs, do it in competition. And wrestle an intruder down. I tell you, it makes you weep. It makes you awe at the greatness of man, especially in times such as these when you wish to despair. Instead, rejoice, my friends. Rejoice at the greatness of Joe Chestnut. Tried to keep it together for you.

SPEAKER_00 1:18

Um, that was amazing that you did that basically off of memory, as far as I could see.

SPEAKER_01 1:22

Oh, I made it up.

SPEAKER_00 1:23

Oh, you made it up. It felt like it was it was like the script that the announcer said. Yeah, isn't it incredible? I love that guy.

SPEAKER_01 1:29

His name is uh George Shea.

SPEAKER_00 1:31

Yeah, he's very popular.

SPEAKER_01 1:32

He's incredible.

SPEAKER_00 1:33

Uh, I mean, I want to watch that every year, but I get too scared that people are gonna barf.

SPEAKER_01 1:37

Uh, I do watch it because it's just hilarious. And like, it's about usually when I like go to work to do a few things, like catch up on email and a few things, so I can have it on my desktop because it streams on ESPN and I watch it. It's just like it's on ESPN. Yeah, it's a damn sport. Like, what else are you gonna do at 10 o'clock on you know? Fourth of July. Yeah. Uh well, it is a sport. Uh-huh. Competitive eating. For those of you that that don't know what we're talking about, the Nathan's hot dog eating contest, uh, Joey Chestnut won for the millionth time in a row.

SPEAKER_00 2:07

And they have he was down. I heard he ate like 12 less than normal or something.

SPEAKER_01 2:12

Yeah, he well, do you know why?

SPEAKER_00 2:14

Yes, he had some injury.

SPEAKER_01 2:16

No, well, yes, that. But do you also know why? No. There was a stage invader. This guy came up to protest, and Joey Chestnut, as he's eating hot dogs, wrestled this guy. Shut up, he put him in a headlock, kept eating hot dogs, and held the guy until security could arrive. George Shea, the announcer dude that goes over the top and has these incredible introductions, uh, also like helped out.

SPEAKER_00 2:41

But it was Um CBS Sports. I just Googled Joey Chestnut. Joey Chestnut regrets putting protester in chokehold at hot dog eating competition.

SPEAKER_01 2:50

I don't, you know, you're in the moment. I do, I think it's hilarious. Uh, one of the, so this guy that's gonna play soccer for one of our biggest rivals, he was uh playing a match the last season, and someone threw a flare on the pitch, as you do in England. He picked it up and threw it back at them. He got banned for a game for that. I'm like, I don't think you can really judge athletes that are in like a really they've been sprinting for 45 minutes. Like you're not in a you're in a fight or flight situation and someone throws a flare at you and you pick it up and throw it back. I don't think you can really you know, Joey Chestnut, he's shoving stuff down his mouth, someone comes up to try to attack him and you put him in a chokehold. I don't think you can be mad at him for that.

SPEAKER_00 3:31

I uh think that probably banning him for one game was the right thing to do. You know, gotta make a point and all. Someone Googled, what is Joey Chestnut's real job? And that Google answered American. This is his job. He lives in Indiana. Does he really? Like currently resides in Westfield, Indiana. Um, let's go visit him. Let's do it.

SPEAKER_01 3:51

Like, what do you eat on a regular day, Joey Chestnut? Maybe some like Shadivan country meat sausages? We should bring him some. We should be like, what do you think? You are a sausage expert.

SPEAKER_00 3:58

I will say I did want to get like just some hot dogs, right? And I would obviously get those from us. At the time, I think we didn't have any, or I didn't want to take the remaining popular inventory. So I got some Nathan's hot dogs. I was like, oh, let's do this. I literally, I I'm not a hot dog eater, but like my kids love them. I almost threw up from the smell. I don't know if like the Nathan's ones are different, but it was like meaty, I it was disgusting.

SPEAKER_01 4:26

I'm sorry to hear that. You had a negative hot dog experience.

SPEAKER_00 4:28

Just a just a Nathan's, and I did it because I knew it from this. So good job advertising in Lake Geneva, Wisconsin. I bought that.

SPEAKER_01 4:34

That works bizarre. I know. Wow.

SPEAKER_00 4:36

I think they sell them at, I think it was from Aldi. Do they? So I didn't want like some weird brand. So I was like, oh, this is a brand I know.

SPEAKER_01 4:42

Because hot dogs can go south. Marketing works, guys. Evidently, Nathan's they go south. How was your 4th of July? Michigan. Did was there any puking involved?

SPEAKER_00 4:50

Let me just say caveat. I can't say that Nathan's hot dogs went south. I don't like hot dogs. I just didn't like this freaking smell. Okay. Uh my 4th of July. No puking, but damn, we were close. So Tyler drove the entire way back from our cottage trip in the back seat with a bucket because we were Lucy like all but turned green right before we left the cottage. And we're like holding it together. What do we do? Oh, what did we do? Gave her fucking ice cream. I did not do that. I specifically said don't give her any ice cream. And then I walk in and she's got a waffle cone full of ice cream, which she ate all of. Uh, but it must have helped her.

SPEAKER_01 5:32

Do you know how people are finally stopping hazing? Because hazing was always like, well, this happened to me. I'm gonna do it to you too. And somebody's finally had the good sense to be like, if we just stop the cycle for one generation, no one else will have to get hazed ever again. Can we stop the cycle of grandparents being like, well, my parents spoiled my kids and made them puke on car rides home by giving them an irresponsible amount of ice cream before tough?

SPEAKER_00 5:54

I I mean, honestly, though, it worked. Can we just like stop the cycle?

SPEAKER_01 5:58

I know, it was a lot, I gotta say.

SPEAKER_00 6:00

Grandparents can spoil children. I get it. I'm sure I'm gonna be that grandparent too, but damn. So anyway, it was good. It was good. Uh it's a it was a lot, you know, one of those uh quote of vacations where you need a vacation from it. Uh, I did not get home to my home to spend more than like 10 hours until 10 p.m. on Monday, and then woke up and started work. And it's been a crazy week because of it. I hate these weeks, don't you? I do. Tell me about your week, Nick. You have a weird ominous thing here. Oh, let me tell me about you want to tell us what we're drinking first.

SPEAKER_01 6:33

Yeah, we should talk about that. Uh you like Sauvignon Blanc. I do. I was thinking about I have a red wine cocktail in mind that I make for some point. Uh, but you said white wine today. Uh, I had this lone single bottle of Saint Serre left. It's French Sauvignon Blanc, it's where Sauvignon Blanc maybe originated from, either Bordeaux or Saint-Cerre, which is down the Loire Valley. Loire Valley. Uh gotta throw in a little bit of the Midwest Wang.

SPEAKER_00 6:59

Tell me what flavors should I be tasting from this?

SPEAKER_01 7:03

Well, so uh you you think of uh New Zealand Sauvignon Blanc as being like super kiwi, grapefruit, all that type of stuff. That's a very different style. French Sauvignon Blanc originally, what it is is like more pear and green apple, and then you get a lot of like kind of minerally notes out of it. Very crisp, very refreshing.

SPEAKER_00 7:22

Okay, but I it's like I like it, I like it, I like it, I like it. And then at the very end, I'm like, hmm, it's a bit minerally to me. And I think I'm just mad at my hard water at my house.

SPEAKER_01 7:32

So it is a bit minerally. That is uh it's grown on uh a very uh shisty soil. Oh, shisty. Shisty. Shisty. Uh, which is you know, you gotta be careful how you say that. This is a family podcast. Oh, yeah. It's not a family podcast. I already dropped the F bomb, I think. And uh, oh, that reminds me of something about my product recommendation. Thank you. That's good. Uh but uh it is very minerally, very crisp, and uh very chuggable. Very chuggable.

SPEAKER_00 8:00

I don't like the taste at the very end. Like I love it, and then it and then I go, when when I've swallowed it and whatever lingers in my mouth. Family podcast 101. Anyway, it's like I keep going back to it though, because I really enjoy it until my mouth sits here like this. Well, that's just because you need some more. Right, and then I drink more to get it with it.

SPEAKER_01 8:24

Have a dot sprenzel and then it'll like just be like that's too hard to not. Don't worry about it. I'm we will report back at the end of the podcast. The other bottle I need to open for you is Minuti Rosette Ruse. Minuti Rose. Minuti Rose. I've okay, so I've read this news story where a guy accidentally said the N-word, and it was because of on like a weather forecast, and it was legitimately because of how the words were aligned on the teleprompter, where it's a legitimate like, and he right away said like and he's like, I'm sorry, I didn't like right away caught himself and he got ripped. And he got fired.

SPEAKER_00 8:59

Oh, come on!

SPEAKER_01 9:00

Which is like ridiculous. Oh it's a known thing.

SPEAKER_00 9:03

Uh you're not allowed to make accidents anymore. No, you're not mistakes, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 9:07

Uh but that's like the as I was saying, like minuti roots, like it's that same thing of like when the words played out. Yeah. Uh but anyway, that's another one that's like 13% alcohol, too expensive for French rose, but like so delicious. And suddenly, and it's in this beautiful bottle that's an awkward stuff. It would be in a beautiful bottle. And it's like this, like, it looks like like the one with the rose on the bottom. Yeah, like you saw the hand shape identity.

SPEAKER_00 9:30

I wish you could see what Nick was doing right now.

SPEAKER_01 9:32

It's like uh a hippie woman, you know. Like that's by hippie, he means curvy. Yes, whatever. You know, like not like smokes a lot of weed hippie. Uh and it's just this beautiful bottle, and so you you start drinking, you're like, this is really good. It's very refreshing. Is there alcohol in this? And suddenly you're two bottles in and $40 pour. I will say, and ooh, is that what it is? Like $20 retail. The uh I mean, it honestly might be worth it. The place where I bought it from originally on premise was charging $30 because she's exorbitantly priced. Uh, what is it called again? Minuti, M-I-N-U-T-Y. Product recommendation early.

SPEAKER_00 10:10

Look at us. Oh, yes, okay. Um, oh, yeah, that's I had to see the bottle. Okay, everybody. Let me just be honest. I have really like very not like Bridget. I haven't had a lot of red wine. I had some at the cottage, like, because it got pretty chilly at night. Um, but I haven't been drinking a lot of red wine because man, it's hot.

SPEAKER_01 10:29

Mostly it is humid. It's so bad. All of the, you know, the wet bulb temperature is high.

SPEAKER_00 10:34

Well, I know. I actually had like a hoodie on this morning and then walked outside and I was like, oh, it's the jungle. Doesn't matter if it's 70 degrees out. Anyway.

SPEAKER_01 10:43

So speaking of my life, yeah, speaking of that, uh, there's a lot to despair about. The uh 4th of July, you know, I was like, okay, I'm gonna forget about the things I'm mad about in America. And then what happened?

SPEAKER_00 10:55

Oh, I didn't think about that.

SPEAKER_01 10:57

60 minutes away, not even 60 minutes away, at a place where I've often gone for different things. We have a lot of customers from, a lot of friends that I talked to from Highland Park, Illinois. There's a shooting at a parade, and you know what comes into my mind right away? All of the bad things again. And I need to stop. Like, I need to stop.

SPEAKER_00 11:19

I'm not I am unable to stop.

SPEAKER_01 11:21

Nihilism is not the way to live.

SPEAKER_00 11:24

I did, I sprung into action with this one. Did you? Yeah. I signed up for some every town events, I called my senators, I wrote letters because I was I like cannot, I cannot function with Shannon and I discussed this because I consume things very differently than she does. Like I just like need all of the information. I'm staring at my phone with every update that CNN publishes.

SPEAKER_01 11:44

Shout out to Shannon. Hope your kids don't puke on the drive.

SPEAKER_00 11:47

Oh, um, they didn't, but Philia's kids are puking on vacation. So vacation with kids, not all it's cracked up to. Um anyway, yeah, I I did. I that's how I, you know, I'm the person that was like, I can't just sit here. Anyway, go on. You needed to change.

SPEAKER_01 12:03

I'm trying very hard to control the things I can control. Own that. Uh, we've talked about this. Sound my th sound like my therapist right now. I'm a list maker, so I've been like doubling down and making lists, checking them off, having that like sense of accomplishment, talking to myself at night, saying, like, Nick, you did good today. Wow. Like, you did these things. Um, so I'm really trying to uh I'm glad you did like those concrete steps to get rid of the assholes. Really, the only thing you can do is vote. It feels useless because it is useless because like, unless it's like a very like arbitrary administrative law thing, we're like, hello, Senator Ron Johnson, I would like you to support this thing the USDA is doing that makes the final cook temperature of Bratwurst 160 degrees instead of 155 degrees, where it's like, I don't know, I don't care. No one's gonna elect me based on this, but if you're a constituent and you say I should do this, I'll do it. Right. Um he doesn't care. It's ridiculous. But all the things you just said are ridiculous. Tammy Baldwin, she don't care. She's gonna do what she's gonna do.

SPEAKER_00 13:03

Like, well, then I'm gonna make their life painful.

SPEAKER_01 13:05

See, I appreciate that. Yeah. People respond to stimuli. Pain is powerful stimuli. Um anyway, yeah. So I'm trying very hard to just like double down, making lists, being happy with my family, controlling that. Good for you. Um it's not working great. I was like, how's it going? Not going great, but you know what?

SPEAKER_00 13:26

I'm telling myself, self, do this, keep it up. I do fall in that everyone, I know this is all a whole bunch of terrible habits. I'll break it one day when my mental health is stronger. But right now, I just reel at night. Like I'm staying up way too late, late. I don't have enough hours in the day. So I'm staying up way too late. Then I lay in bed and I scroll on my phone and I just have to get myself out of that, right? So I play crossword puzzles on my phone and word searches. So like I have a routine, no matter how tired I am. I'm doing a word search, I'm doing the stupid bubble pop game, and I'm playing a crossword. And then once I'm done with all of that, I always go into my photos from the day and look at a photo of my kids. And then I go to bed. It's like a weird routine, but it snaps me out of like the cycle. And then I'm like, okay, this is this is what I should be focusing on.

SPEAKER_01 14:18

I got an idea for you that could help you. Okay. Move to Mars. The day is 24 hours, 37 minutes, and 22 seconds. Perfect. You say you don't have enough time in the day, you would gain 37 minutes and 22 seconds. Now let's let's Emily, you heard it here first. We're moving to Mars. Uh, so let's, you know, it's it's kind of like the you like to do the like, it's just a cup of coffee a day thing. So 37 minutes, let's extrapolate this out. Did you okay times seven? Uh that is 259 minutes a week, or roughly four hours. Whoa, see, look at that. In a month, that is seven seven thousand seven hundred and seventy, which is one hundred and thirty hours. In a year. I've lost you, Nick. You would gain one thousand five hundred-four hours or sixty-four days. 65 days. Shut up! You could have 65 more days. Look at that, just by just by simply moving to Mars. Call up Elon. I know he's interested in it. Call up Bezos. I know he's interested in it. I have a quiz for you.

SPEAKER_00 15:28

Do you know how many kids he has now? Elon? Yes. Like seven. Ten. He just had twins with some girl that works for him. And then he also had a daughter, or uh, I can't, I don't remember now if it's a daughter or a son.

SPEAKER_01 15:42

He's a non-binary child.

SPEAKER_00 15:44

Ten. He has ten kids. Okay. Moving on. That was nuts to me. So uh my, you know, how was your week notes?

SPEAKER_01 15:52

Uh I bet he hollered, we want prenup. I hope he did. 18 years. 18 years. And I'm not sure. You find out that he ain't yours.

SPEAKER_00 16:02

He found out he isn't. Um, okay. So we got a Kanye reference in. Oh, this is like someone just made a joke about Kanye that was so perfect. Okay, I don't remember it. So this is a useless comment. All right. So I was saying, like, I'm trying, you know, we always say at the beginning of the podcast, like, we're not gonna be Debbie Downers. But like then the world keeps sucking. So we're trying here, guys. So what I did was instead of shoving in 10 news stories like I wanted to, I found a few great lovely things to share. Buy me a coffee. Am I supposed to buy you a coffee? Oh no, so I just when you said something about coffee, have you heard of that as a fundraising site? No. So you quent and quarantine.

SPEAKER_01 16:42

Yeah, that one I know. Yes. I've never heard of it until small independent places like bloggers, people that uh create free content on the internet, say like, hey, if you'd like to contribute, you can buy me a coffee.

SPEAKER_00 16:52

It's a great, it's a great way to do it. I don't know. I think I think it's great because in your head, coffee's like five bucks, right? So you're like, here's my five dollars.

SPEAKER_01 16:59

I would respond more to buy me a Red Bull.

SPEAKER_00 17:01

Well, you would. The rest of the world wouldn't. Red Bull's expensive.

SPEAKER_01 17:04

I was thinking, so I had my calendar reminder come up when you come up with a fun, uh, different podcast idea. We try to bring you guys some like different concepts, you know, once every six weeks or so. Every yeah. Uh you had a really great one uh that was like as my calendar reminder comes up, you texted me that. I was like, whoa.

SPEAKER_00 17:22

Wait, which one? For today?

SPEAKER_01 17:25

For the future.

SPEAKER_00 17:26

Oh, for the future, yes. Oh, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 17:28

But we also have had two different people offer some ideas on a coffee-related one that might be fun. I do have a coffee one that and thank you to all the listeners that have started offering me coffee.

SPEAKER_00 17:39

And shout out to my Aunt Mary, who inspired one of our coffee-related ideas. More to come on that.

SPEAKER_01 17:45

So if you like coffee, keep listening to this podcast. It's more gonna be like coffee after the dinner with drinks.

SPEAKER_00 17:55

But a little star. Um, okay, two lovely stories to share with you. One, I'll start with the local one, um, the most local one, because a lot of you will not know what this is, but I thought this was pretty cool. Um, close to us here in Lake Geneva, and very close to the store, actually, there is a the store's property of Butts Lake Ivanhoe. Do we call it a town? Is it a town? Um unincorporated community. Well, not anymore. It's still unincorporated. So yeah, it's um it's called Lake Ivanhoe, right? Well, it's an actual lake. Yes, it is a lake, but there's a community of homes and people living there around the lake.

SPEAKER_01 18:27

Like uh the Geneva Club or South Shore Club, or that's what it was. That's what it was.

SPEAKER_00 18:33

So it was established July 1st, 1926. It is Wisconsin's first black-owned resort community, and it it received historical status this summer. Which is really cool. It's so cool, and like no one, not a lot of people pay attention to it around here, to be honest. And it's kind of tucked away. Like uh my parents, I didn't even know it existed until my parents bought a house on that side of town, basically. So it's a really cool little spot and it got some recognition. So I thought that was a fun little local story we should share.

SPEAKER_01 19:02

I think we've talked about it a little bit before as we talked about the value of representation, but so um on Geneva Lake, there's a lot of rich white dudes. There's the Elgin Club, there's the Richmond Club, there's the this club, or this club, where a community association in the 1880s to 1920s bought 300 acres of land on Geneva Lake, subdivided out, and if you lived in Richmond, Elgin, wherever, you were eligible to buy one of these lots, and you had a little cottage and there was a community thing and a beach and a whatever. Um, black people were obviously excluded from that. Obviously. I know that feels bad to say that, but like at the time, yeah, you know, uh, so the black community still of Chicago still wanted a resort area, and there's this uh there's Lake Como, which is quite big, and then there's Lake Ivanhoe, which is kind of little. But they said, let's make Lake Ivanhoe ours. Nobody's lived there. And so a lot of the black churches in Chicago bought property around the lake and did the same thing, and that's how that community started.

SPEAKER_00 20:00

I didn't know that.

SPEAKER_01 20:01

Yep, and one of the black churches bought property on the this side of the lake, which would be the west side of the lake, uh, did it in the late 20s, stock market crashed. They never did the building, went to sheriff sale, and my grandparents bought it. And that's how we have all of the property that we have.

SPEAKER_00 20:19

Oh, wow. I always wonder about land acquisition. So that's like sheriff's sale.

SPEAKER_01 20:24

We got it for like 50 bucks. Shut up. So like it's like 80 some acres. Uh. And then plus we have all this from like the 1840s, and it's dude. It's like you can't tell me, like, oh yeah, we have like an eight, and people, how much money you have? Like, well, we got it from a sheriff's sale.

SPEAKER_00 20:37

I want to do this for my kids, though. I want to buy some cheap ass land. Yeah. One day we'll be worth it. Something.

SPEAKER_01 20:42

Um the really cool thing about Ivanhoe, though, when they did it and they developed it out, uh, the streets are all like Christmas Attics Drive. Uh Dunbar, so they're all named after prominent, famous black people in history. And so my bus route went through there. Oh. I live on that was my bus route.

SPEAKER_00 20:58

Oh.

SPEAKER_01 20:58

Um, and so you're like, who the it's Christmas addicts?

SPEAKER_00 21:01

That's funny.

SPEAKER_01 21:01

So you pull out the encyclopedia because we're so old, you're like, Because Nick likes history. And he was a free black man in Boston that went to the uh, you know, Boston massacre and he was shot there after some heroic things and died. And so you learn about these like prominent black people in history that weren't taught about it. I think we're doing a better job of teaching about them 20 years later. But barely. So it was a cool way of doing some recognition and seeing people.

SPEAKER_00 21:25

This town ceases to amaze me because I give it shit all the time about like, oh, such a small town, move me back to a city. But you and I had incredibly different childhoods and grew up 10 miles away from one another. I grew up on the other side of Lake Geneva, and we say like the other side of town. I grew up, you know, I don't I don't know how to explain it to people that don't live here. The other side of town. I never had an experience anything like that. I did see a car crash right in front of my face into the manor pillars. Yeah, it was devastating. Okay, everyone lived, but it was still horrifying when I was in fourth grade. So that was a cool local story. Move out a little bit bigger to our friends in Chicago.

SPEAKER_01 22:02

Shout out to uh whomever headed up this thing because it's like well overdue. And Pooh, what thing? Oh, the Lake Ivanhoe. Yeah, Pooh on you Visit Lake Geneva that shared a link to a paywalled article instead of writing your own blog post and like showing up to the actual dedication. Oh, damn. You should have come out to the thing.

SPEAKER_00 22:20

Well, I didn't see honestly, I didn't see it shared from Visit Lake Geneva.

SPEAKER_01 22:22

They did share it, but it was to a paywalled article on the regional news. So it was like the lowest effort of lowest effort things. I saw it in Journal Sentinel.

SPEAKER_00 22:30

Um and Isn't that funny? That's where I saw it, not the local places.

SPEAKER_01 22:35

So like this could have been, you know, we always talk about we want more diversity here. Could have done some really cool stuff.

SPEAKER_00 22:40

Damn. Well, I hope that the rest of you now that don't live in the area have a chance to read it. You could look at the larger scale newspaper out of Milwaukee. Uh I wonder if uh larger papers outside of Wisconsin picked it up, actually.

SPEAKER_01 22:53

I would hope so because it's it's definitely um It's really cool. Yeah, and I would hope some of the um black centric media also picked up on it because it's it's a really interesting story. Um that would be, I think, interesting of that.

SPEAKER_00 23:06

So, okay, past our little local community here. We are moving to Chicago. Did you see this article about uh Ken Griffin? I did not. So he is the CEO of Citadel and he has been based in Chicago forever. And they're he's moving their offices to Miami, which like why ew, Florida, lawless. I'm going to Miami. Um Miami. But he gave so like it was nice to see instead of like shitbag CEO, middle-aged white men that do a lot of shitty things, he is giving $130 million in parting gifts to uh local Chicago institutions. So he has been one of the.

SPEAKER_01 23:41

I also feel like he did this because he's mad at uh Lightfoot.

SPEAKER_00 23:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 23:46

Maybe I don't care why he did it. I can't be too mad at anybody because she's a disaster.

SPEAKER_00 23:51

He has um been, you know, the biggest donor, one of the biggest donors for Northwestern Medicine, University of Chicago, Field Museum. Um, there's 40 different recipients that he divided $130 million in donations. And he was just, I mean, uh obviously he's saying the right things, but he's saying he's doing this to kind of um bridge the gap until they can find new donors. But like that's a huge void to fill. So I just thought it was cool instead of being like giving Chicago the middle finger, which you could right now because Chicago, Nick thinks he is giving them the middle finger.

SPEAKER_01 24:21

Oh no, he's said a lot, no, he's actually said a lot of things that are giving, which there's a lot of validations.

SPEAKER_00 24:26

He might be giving the city the middle finger, but he is helping support the things that make the city, which is what I care about. I don't give a shit about the city of Chicago. There's a lot of really care about the things that I go visit, quite frankly, in Chicago. So I thought it was a pretty cool thing uh that he was doing. Also, good for you if you're getting out of Chicago, but like why go to Florida? I know why, but you. So that was a little more good news, bad news. If you choose to look at it that way, Nick.

SPEAKER_01 24:50

No, I thought it was good news. I'm actually glad to see it because he's been like a total dick on his way out. Like, there's a lot of really bad things happening in Chicago.

SPEAKER_00 24:58

I haven't seen him being a total dick on the way out. So I I am seeing the good news because clearly that's what I'm being targeted with.

SPEAKER_01 25:05

Um yeah, I think he maybe just listened to uh Welcome to Miami decide that's why. Oh, also no state income taxes.

SPEAKER_00 25:13

Yeah, I mean, I know why he's going to Florida. I just hate Florida.

SPEAKER_01 25:16

Uh let's pronounce flow right up. Um so I have a kind of controversial good news article I'd like to share. I don't read the journal Sentinel, I read on Milwaukee because I'm for the people. And uh this is about a very controversial festival called Weird Fest. And Mobcraft Brewing, which famously was uh on Shark Tank and turned down a buttload of money because they wanted to keep their artistric integrity. Henry. Um which I kind of agree with them and kind of don't. It was an interesting, I would have taken the money because it was a better offer than they came looking for. Which is like when you don't take that, you just went on there for the pub, not because you actually wanted the money. Who cares, man? Good job. So they weren't they their thing was they do it's called mob craft because they take their craft beer ideas from the mob. So they crowdsource, they say, like, hey, if you uh are a supporter of ours, we're gonna put out five possible recipes and you can vote for which one you want, and we'll make it. And they did this like seven years ago, I want to say, like before crowdfunding was totally on the open up. They've been open for nine years. Nine years, wow. Um God, I'm old.

SPEAKER_00 26:21

I just am looking.

SPEAKER_01 26:23

So anyway, they do most breweries do an anniversary party. It's a lot of fun. And there's, yes, it says right here to the ninth. Um, they're doing their weird fast. Now they've gotten cancelled over this like three times because the idea of weird fast is they do beers that are weird. Well, let me tell you the beers that they're bringing back. A Milwaukee roll, sushi-inspired rice lager with turmeric, lemongrass, cucumber, ginger, and toast, sesame seeds. Curry kolch, curry-inspired kolsch with curry spices, coconut, and peanuts. They've done a few others. Ethnic communities have gotten incredibly pissed off at them. Really? You think curry's weird food? Well, you know, there's more people in India that eat curry than people in America. And if you think curry's weird, you're a white Anglocentric man that should be canceled. So they've gotten cancelled over this many times. And they've had to do some like this festival for calling like curry weird, calling sushi roll weird.

SPEAKER_00 27:20

It's not weird in that way. Uh it's weird as a beer.

SPEAKER_01 27:23

They've done some pairing things that the like, oh, I don't I don't want to get canceled. So I mean he's like, oh, you shouldn't have done that. Like, uh, I was talking to Kim and the school list is like, if you're a boy, bring this, and if you're a girl, bring that. And I was like, Well, what if you're a non-bot? I'm like, Nick, shut up. You're just being a jerk now. Well, and that's what people are doing. Like, open the door to this. Like, this is so funny that I'm like, good on you guys for doubling down on this. Be like, no, screw you politically correct assholes.

SPEAKER_00 27:52

I'm like, not they're not trying to be offensive because curry is eaten more in India than it is here or whatever. Like it's a weird beer.

SPEAKER_01 27:58

Like, why would you think to put curry in beer? They're bringing these flavors to people, they're doing something that you wouldn't normally do. Bringing attention to your food. So, like, my God. I I'm like really glad they're running this back. I'm really glad they're just like double middle fingering everybody. This is like the push-pull of American politics, and why quite honestly the left continues to lose. Because if I'm fighting about real things like, hey, we should have universal access to healthcare, they're mad that someone called curry weird.

SPEAKER_00 28:24

Also, they're the nicest. I mean, I only know one half of the ownership, but he's like the nicest person in the world. He's not trying to piss people off. Uh, oh, feel so angry because obviously, like, there are issues that are incredibly important. But I'm saying I don't think they're like, yes, they're saying it's weird beer for flavor, but you know, weird has a different kind of like get weird. I don't know how to explain this, like the different definition of weird. It's not calling curry weird. It's just saying it's cool. Like, you know, I don't know, it's like a new hip kids are doing.

SPEAKER_01 28:55

One is describing a woman's body shape, which we should never do, and one is describing a type of alternative lifestyle. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_00 29:03

You should never call people tired, Nick. I came into work the other day and I was like, I'm just tired. And he's like, Yeah, you look tired.

SPEAKER_01 29:09

No, no, no. And I said, You don't do that. I'd like, hey, are you okay? And you're like, I'm not sure. I'm really tired. Okay, you kind of look because like I was worried something.

SPEAKER_00 29:17

You can't say that.

SPEAKER_01 29:18

I was worried something's like really wrong.

SPEAKER_00 29:20

Like, I don't know, someone supporters, please email in and tell Nick he can never tell a woman they look tired or a man. You shouldn't tell anybody. I would have led with that.

SPEAKER_01 29:31

PTSD. Yeah, I wouldn't have come into work. You would have been better if it said, like, oh yeah, it looks like you had PTSD over puke.

SPEAKER_00 29:38

No, you don't say you look like anything except glorious and wonderful.

SPEAKER_01 29:42

Okay, well, I was worried about you. Sorry.

SPEAKER_00 29:45

Men are from Mars. You can move to Mars.

SPEAKER_01 29:49

Okay. I will gain an extra month every year. 60. No, way more than a month, man. Two months. I'm bad at math. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 29:56

Okay, guys.

SPEAKER_01 29:57

This Go to Weird Fast. Go to Weird Fast. Actually, yeah, that's Mondalucha wrestling, live music, street performers, face painters. Every live event has face painters, vendors, and more at the free festival. It looks great. Again, as people that organize events, we're like, okay, we got this, this, and we can just say like and more. And then we always go like, well, what's the and more? And we're both like, I don't know. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 30:17

Who cares? And more. There's people, unique people. I don't know. Uh well, I mean, whatever. Free festival. Also, I'm free that weekend, so maybe. Uh, okay. So mine is a good old childhood game-playing article here. So I originally saw it on Good News Movement on Instagram. Um, but have you seen the cycling race that was recently decided by Rock Paper Scissors? No. Oh my god, I fully thought you would have seen this. So it was the tour of Slovenia. Obviously, it's not like a race I'm watching. Um, but there was it was the fourth stage, they were near the finish, and there were um two teammates, Rafael Maika and Tadeo. I have no idea how to say these names. I'm sorry. Um, they were cycling side by side. Like it was very clear that like one of them was just gonna have to like be a dick and barely outcycle the other to win. So instead, they uh pogakar, I'm sure that's not how you say it, uh, extended his right arm and balled and balled his fist to do a rock, paper, scissors. And he understood the message, man. Like they're cycling, they're just right next to each other. It doesn't look like they say any words, and it's all just like, okay. And they played rock, paper, scissors one time, and they that's how they decided who won the race. They held hands and like just one inched right above right in front of the other, and like they're saying all the right things. Everyone's so great. This was so lovely. It was just like a full-on. I think it made me cry the day I saw it because like 2022 is the worst. So yeah, it was so adorable. So, hey guys, remember what if we were just good sports and nice people? Okay, that's my weekly reminder to not be a dick.

SPEAKER_01 31:54

I um I've heard rock, paper, scissors is being rebranded. Oh, to what, Nick? Well, it's not scissors, it's the peace sign.

SPEAKER_00 32:01

And if you flash the peace sign, you win because peace always Oh boy, that was that was a stretch.

SPEAKER_01 32:08

Chop, chop, chop, chop. Remember, get your vasectomy because you can't get an abortion anymore.

unknown 32:14

Peace.

SPEAKER_01 32:15

We'll be right back. Jesus.

SPEAKER_00 32:36

Sure do. I'm really pumped about mine because it's it's a very mom thing. Super uh something about mine. Oh, you changed yours. I was wondering what yours was before. Top Gun Maverick.

SPEAKER_01 32:48

Okay, you got it, man. Go for it. Uh okay, so I know everybody else has already seen this. Like $1.1 billion in revenue. So like people have seen this. But I am telling you, like, I want to go bomb Iran right now. Whoa. Because like this movie was so good. Tom Cruise, excellent acting. None of the like, oh, I wish. You know how like you're like Tom Cruise, I love you, but you're a weird Scientologist, dude. You're a weird guy. Um, you just like forget that he's a weird dude, and you're like, I love you, I love this movie.

SPEAKER_00 33:14

Are we gonna get canceled because we said weird?

SPEAKER_01 33:19

Okay. That the title sequence, I love title sequences of movies. I just like think that's such a great art form that people are just like, can we watch the movie? I'm like, no, like they're setting the scene, like how they do things is great. I love title sequences. The editing involved with this title sequence, like it probably like 200 hours of footage that they then you know took down to 90 seconds. Ooh. And you're just like, get into it, and I'm like, from the first thing, I'm like, let's go. Well, let's go. Let's go. It might be better than the original, in all honesty. Probably is. I've heard it. Um it is so much fun, it is a great movie. It is. I read some reviews that are like, if you want to go and see tired old ideas of America being this, and you like masculine competition that has some token colored people. Like, if you can't like this movie and want to shit talk it as a movie reviewer, you shouldn't be a movie reviewer. Because you know what? The movie actually did a great job of inclusion, a great job of like real enough that like it's plausible, practical effects, not all CGI. Like, and then you know what? It's supposed to be a fun summer blockbuster to go, like, oh my gosh, did you see the jet do that? It's so cool.

SPEAKER_00 34:31

So it's I have heard all positive facts.

SPEAKER_01 34:33

Everybody should go see it. The reviewers that say it sucks should be shot. Well, maybe not that. Maybe not that far. Um, I went to Imagine Theater, always positive experience. Uh, had a frozen strawberry daiquiri with it, uh, because I felt my best alcoholic bang for my buck was to get that. They use very cheap rum in it and it gives you ice cream headaches. I would not recommend that.

SPEAKER_00 34:57

Um I've never I've only ever had a beer, I think, there.

SPEAKER_01 35:00

And I would also not recommend the $16 high noon.

SPEAKER_00 35:04

Oh, is that really $16?

SPEAKER_01 35:06

It was $16. I was like, because I thought about that because like you know, it's refreshing.

SPEAKER_00 35:11

I actually feel like their food is pretty fairly priced. I think it is too, but the drinks are where they get you.

SPEAKER_01 35:15

Oh, that's smart. But I don't I don't have a problem with it because you know they don't make money off the movies.

SPEAKER_00 35:19

So oh, oh yes.

SPEAKER_01 35:24

I don't know, you might know this. You probably do know this. We talked about in the podcast before. They have a studio Ghibli festival next month.

SPEAKER_00 35:31

Yeah, but in China.

SPEAKER_01 35:32

No, no, no, no. At Imagine, they're showing three of the movies.

SPEAKER_00 35:35

Oh, I maybe did know this. Daniel probably has been planning it with Tyler.

SPEAKER_01 35:40

Uh I wasn't sure, but in case Daniel hasn't been playing it with Tyler, make sure Tyler goes and watches them.

SPEAKER_00 35:46

He will be at Daniel's tonight, so I will report back next week. Interesting. Oh, now I'm like distracted looking at it. I saw a funny thing. This is we're getting off topic. You're welcome. Uh I fell in a TikTok hole last night. I was like, I'm just gonna give this a try. From TikTok, I went to TikTok because I was like, listen, I want to curate my home, like my Discover page and just see if any of this stuff. And I fell in a hole and then I felt dumber. So dumb. I can't so dumb. I cannot believe what our world is becoming, but also I watched it. Anyway, some guy bought out a theater for the minions movie and made everyone dress up like Groo, and it was a funny ass TikTok.

SPEAKER_01 36:27

Have you seen that uh theaters are now banning that? No, why? Uh because literally why? Supposedly it's like bad antisocial behavior.

SPEAKER_00 36:37

Okay, ridiculous.

SPEAKER_01 36:38

I saw a TikTok of this guy that somebody asked if you could have unlimited anything, what would you have? And he said, uh Dyson air wrap curler thing, because every woman wants one and I would just be swimming in it because I could just give them out to women. I don't want one. Uh so that's another product recommendation right there. Evidently, these things are like very good.

SPEAKER_00 37:00

Yeah, they're all over Dyson Air Wrap.

SPEAKER_01 37:03

Dyson air wrap. Uh you can style with air, not extreme heat. Uh I I don't have long enough hair to know if this is Okay, we're done talking about the Dyson Air Wrap. Uh the only styler to curl, shape, and hide flyaways using the Koanda effect with no extreme effect.

SPEAKER_00 37:23

You move to Wisconsin in this humidity and tell me the Koanda effect is solving anyone's problems. Okay, listen up.

SPEAKER_01 37:30

Oh, and they have some for complete long, complete, and complete curly sessions.

SPEAKER_00 37:34

Listen up. We're back with my practice recommendation, everybody. Nick is sharing the Dyson Air wrap with you for his long hair. Um okay, I follow like some uh, you know, mom blogs, and there's one called Yummy Toddler Food, which is oh god, I hope that's right. I don't want to, I don't want to be wrong here. So she shares like really great, yeah, yummy toddler food. Uh obviously I found her on Instagram. Her website is yummy toddlerfood.com. But my kids are obsessed with popsicles. Uh Lucy asks for probably 12 a day. First thing she does when she wakes up, everything after dinner, she asks for popsicles all day. So, like, you know, summer parenting, we give them to her. But yummy toddler food has a recipe of like, hey, just make the like uh make your own popsicles, which I've done. Popsicles are easy. I've frozen smoothies, you know, and made sure I had them in the morning, giving them to the kids. We've talked about that on here. Anyway, my kids right now obsessed with the like the cheapy plastic, you know, like good old school summer popsicles. They're delicious. So they they care if you have that popsicle or a popsicle with a stick because they're children and they will drive you to insanity. Oh, so you mean like the push-up pops? Yeah, like the plastic wrapper where you have to cut it off or a popsicle with a stick. Yep. There's a difference, apparently. Are you confused at the two types of popsicles? Yeah, I'm not sure. No, not a push-up, not the cardboard tube. Are you effing kidding me that you don't know what these plastic you buy them juice in like a you buy a hundred of them for like two dollars? Oh, those things, yeah. Flavol pops or whatever the hell. I was like, do you not know what these are?

SPEAKER_01 39:05

I've considered them that thing. Flavo pops? Popstacles have a stick.

SPEAKER_00 39:10

No, bro. Popsicles are just frozen icy sugar. Okay. Please tell us. Settle this debate. Although I know I'm right.

SPEAKER_01 39:18

Can you tell anybody if they look tired?

SPEAKER_00 39:21

No, and also popsicles come in a plastic bag that you cut the top off of. Anyway, so making, I'm not here to like make all my own kids' food because I don't have time for that.

SPEAKER_01 39:32

But you did write a baby food book.

SPEAKER_00 39:34

I did help with that. Um, but I do make popsicles because we always just use juice, like we'll just dump juice in or whatever. So you can buy, I always have bought molds with the stick, right? So it's a popsicle in Nick's book, but Yummy Toddler Food shared these popsicle bags.

SPEAKER_01 39:49

Right and tell us what your book says.

SPEAKER_00 39:51

They're the plastic bags, but they have a zipper at the top. Uh, so you can reuse them, et cetera. But you can buy 150 of them for $20. Um, it says disposable popsicle pouch with silicone, and it comes with a little funnel to put it in there. Um, so I don't know if you want to wash them or not, but there's 150 of them for 20 bucks. We'll link to it on Amazon. We make a couple cents if you buy it using our link, but like literally four cents. So thank you.

SPEAKER_01 40:14

Thank you, guys. We appreciate it.

SPEAKER_00 40:15

Also, make your own popsicles, man. They're fun. If you eat as many popsicles as my kids, make your own popsicles. How about that?

SPEAKER_01 40:22

We'll be right back. One of the ways my therapist has told me to deal with my life is because I'm a kind of a ridiculous person, as I'm standing by, like, yeah, Bridget, I did tell you you looked tired, but to be mean to you. Yeah, you dick. I meant it as like I was concerned for you. Doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. You're right. It matters how it comes across. I'm I apologize. I'll never do it again. Apologize on air. I will never do it again. But one of the things I wanted to put out there as like I was doing to control things to make so you could laugh at me. And I th you've already laughed at me, but I'm gonna let everyone else laugh at me. Great. Um laugh at yourself with everybody else, not be, you know, like a pompous ass about it. Don't be bridget about being mad about calling tired. No, no, no, no, no. I'm kidding, I'm kidding. Uh uh I have spent about 10 minutes redoing my Apple Watch faces. Oh. Because one of my problems with and I would wear two because Apple Watch on their default wall face are terrible at telling times. Like ultimately the point of the watch is to tell times. There's a huge numbers, terrible. I do not like digital watch faces. I want an analog one. So I have spent about eight minutes total. More, more than eight minutes. Okay, maybe 17 redoing my watch faces. And like I like having the weather on here, so I know like that one's dumb. I like that one. Don't you just have the one that has a little globe in the corner?

SPEAKER_00 42:04

I like that one.

SPEAKER_01 42:04

But that's digital. I know. Well, but it's Simona. I know, so you can cry every time you look at your watch. And she's so cute. And then I have a chronometer because you know, like, I like to keep time.

SPEAKER_00 42:16

I always just use the really boring, it had a globe with the weather in one corner. It had no, it had a globe in in the background. I can't remember now. Um it had the weather in the upper right, date in the upper left, and a um uh the clock that's not digital. Analog? I'm like literally drawing circles on my wrist, you guys. That's what I always used, but it was an old Apple Watch and now it's dead.

SPEAKER_01 42:41

R-I-P. So I like I like this. I like this. I spent a lot of time. This is part of my like, you know what? It's bothering me. That I'm wearing two watches? I'm investing and fix it. Well, also, I really like the style of an analog watch.

SPEAKER_00 42:53

Then why do you wear an Apple watch?

SPEAKER_01 42:54

Because I like the like tracking things, and I like that tells me to get off my fat ass.

SPEAKER_00 42:58

But you don't need a watch then. You can just like have a step tracker.

SPEAKER_01 43:03

Like the OG Fitbit. Yeah, they suck. Yes, they all suck. I did Fitbit for a long time, and it sucks.

SPEAKER_00 43:09

Yeah, it does suck. It's terrible. I believe we thought about this three years ago. I love my Apple Watch.

SPEAKER_01 43:14

Congratulations, Bridget. You were right.

SPEAKER_00 43:16

Yeah, no shit. Look at it. Humble. I'm so humble here. I really miss my Apple Watch. I'm gonna I just need to buy a new one. Why don't I just buy a new one? Because I don't need the latest and greatest. Give me an old series. Yeah. Yeah. I don't care. I want an old one and that's only a hundred some dollars instead of three hundred.

SPEAKER_01 43:34

Seven, eight, and three out right now. And three's like seven hundred dollars, eight's like eight hundred dollars, and seven's like six hundred dollars.

unknown 43:41

What?

SPEAKER_00 43:42

But I was like $125 when I bought it. Okay, anyway, I'm missing inflation. Yeah, seriously. I'll wait to buy it. Okay, guys, here's what we're gonna do today. I tried to make a funny segment about the Nordstrom sale, but if you don't follow the influencer world like I do, it would not be funny, but damn, it's funny. Speaking of inflation, Nordstrom. Redstrom has cut their affiliate revenue for in for influencers in half. That's bullshit. And they're still doing, I mean, so many of so some influencers were like, F you, I'm not doing it. And then that the one influencer I'm talking about specifically is the one she screenshotted her email from the uh affiliate company. And so she's not doing any sales stuff. And then many of the others are still doing it. I'm like, dude, it's half. It's still a butt ton of money for them. I mean, so much money just on this sale.

SPEAKER_01 44:26

At least they pay unlike HelloFresh. Doesn't even pay. Okay, bro. All right. We have a potential spam call. Should we answer it on air? Oh my god, no. That should be our segment after the break. That was good timing. Oh my gosh. Could we get like the Tyler would listen to the Tyler would be listening and he'd be like, no, you did that part wrong.

SPEAKER_00 44:47

Yes. Tyler loves answering spam calls. It makes me so uncomfortable. America's Bath Bitter keeps calling me. Like, one time you stopped and talked to us at the Warworth County Fair 10 years ago. Are you interested in a quote now? I'm like, nope. Thank you for calling four times today.

SPEAKER_01 45:02

Let me tell you why I stopped at the Warworth County Fair. It was really hot. You had free water, and I was interested in your free water. Do you start getting free water for me? No? No, I don't want a tub. Fit over my other tub, but thank you. I've never quite understood that one either. I'm like.

SPEAKER_00 45:18

I mean, I will say I understand it because I hate the color of our tubs. And I'm like, just put another plastic thing over it so it's white for now, but like it's just gonna leak. I asked my dad and he yelled at me. He was like, no, it's a terrible idea.

SPEAKER_01 45:32

Your dad was on fire at the last beer event, by the way. I was like, oh my god, oh my god. These are people I work with. I gave him one little needling that was. Yeah, that was your fault. And then I was like, oh, well, because he was already, I was like, let's try and deflect you off of the stuff. No, there's no deflecting. I just walked away.

SPEAKER_00 45:53

Thanks, Tyler Huttner, for listening. Oh, poor Tyler Huttner. Well, you gotta do what you gotta do, man. All right. All right. So today, because people are assholes truly behind computer screens, we are reading funny product reviews.

SPEAKER_01 46:07

I vote Is this first one better for you to read or better for me to read? Sure.

SPEAKER_00 46:12

I think it's you actually. Um, I'm not sure, so I'm gonna let you start. So we're gonna take turns and pick some of these. This is a list from a few years back, but I am confident people are just as rude and terrible. But these ones aren't rude. They're like really fucking hilarious. However, people actually write mean reviews like this about things. So please enjoy some of the most hilarious Amazon product reviews ever.

SPEAKER_01 46:34

This review is a five-star review for a bick for her medium ballpoint pen. Bick for her written by a Keen Skier. My husband has never allowed me to write, as he should, as he doesn't want me touching man's pens. A man's pen is his prerogative, and if you want your woman to touch it, let her touch it. But you know what? There's sometimes you don't want your woman touching your pen. Nick is going off script already. However, when I saw this product, I decided to buy it using my pocket money, men. Don't have joint accounts. Give your do stop. Do the cash envelope method Dave Ramsey is right on. He was only divorced like seven times, and give your wife that pocket money. That's how you should do it, men. And so far it has been fabulous. Once I had learnt to write, okay, woman, it's learned. Learned, not learnt. This is why we don't let you write. The feminine color, and she spelled it with a U, so obviously she's some dumb British broad. Oh my god. And the grip size, which was more suited to my delicate little hands. You should be so grateful for this, woman, that we men with our big man brains thought to accommodate your tiny hands, has enabled me to vent thoughts about new recipe ideas. Don't make new ones, just make the old ones better. Sewing and gardening. That's right. That's right. Inflation is bad. Stay home, watch the kids, daycare's expensive. Garden me some food. Garden me some food. My husband is less pleased with this product as he believes it will lead to more independence and he hates the feminine tingling sensation, along with the visions of fairies and rainbows he gets whenever he picks it up. Uh, your husband might be getting those because he actually maybe is gay.

SPEAKER_00 48:16

Uh-uh. So maybe right with the pens, girl. Get after it. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 48:21

I mean, if you have a synergy thing in your hand.

SPEAKER_00 48:25

Wouldn't you be curious? I wonder if these pens are still called this. You Google it. I was like, Google it while I read this next one.

SPEAKER_01 48:31

I feel like the uh razors for women thing have also stopped.

SPEAKER_00 48:35

Well, I mean, like, I have a razor that's pink still. That like I recently bought. Anyway, I like pink. Um, okay. I'm skipping a few great ones because I have to start with this one because I'm not sure I'm gonna even be able to make it through. I was laughing out loud over the break. So this is Haribo Sugar Free Gummy Bear Gummy Bears five pound bag. Five pound bag, everybody.

unknown 49:02

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 49:02

I'm really bad at like getting my shit together to be able to read, so this will be good. This received a one-star review by Christine Tarok. Tarok, yeah, okay. Oh man, words cannot express what happened to me after eating after eating these. The gummy bear cleanse. If you are someone that can tolerate the sugar substitute, enjoy. If you are like dozens of people that tried my order, run. First of all, for taste, I would rate these a five. So good. Soft, true to taste, fruit flavors like the sugar variety. I was a happy camper. But, or should I say, but not long after eating about 20 of these, all hell broke loose. I had a gastrointestinal experience like nothing I've ever imagined. Cramps, sweating, bloating beyond my worst nightmare. I've had food poisoning from some bad shellfish, and that was almost like a skip in the park compared to what was going on inside me. Then came the uh flatulence. Heavens to Murgatroid? What's that mean? Heavens to Murgatroid, the sounds like trumpets calling the demons back to hell. The stench, like 1,000 rotten corpses vomited. I couldn't stand to stay in one room for fear. For fear of succumbing to my own odors. But wait. But wait, there's more.

unknown 50:30

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 50:32

This is too bad we're not doing this one on video.

SPEAKER_00 50:37

But wait, there's more. What came out of me felt like someone tried to funnel. Funnel. Niagara falls through and copies. Okay. I actually have tears in my eyes, you guys. Okay. I swear my spinctors were screaming. It felt like my delicate starfish was a gaping maw projectile bomb. A torrential flood of toxic waste. 100% liquid. Flammable liquid. Napalm. It was actually a bit humorous for a nanosecond, as it was just beyond anything. It was beyond anything I can imagine possible. And it went on for hours. You guys, this review goes on and on. Okay, I'll try and do this one really quick. I felt violated when it was over, which I think might have been sometime in the early morning of the next day. There was stuff coming out of me that I ate at my wedding in 2005. I had five pounds of these innocent-looking, delicious, tasting hell bears. So I told a friend about what happened, thinking it had to be some type of sensitivity I had to the sugar substitute. And in spite of my warnings and graphic descriptions, she decided to take her take her chances and take them off my hands. Silly woman. All the same for her. And a phone call from her while on the toilet, because you kind of end up living in the bathroom for a spell, telling me she really wished she would have listened. I think she was crying. It goes on and on to describe how then another sister tried it and everyone had the same experience. If you order these, best of luck to you. And please don't post a video during the aftershock. When I ordered these, the warnings and disclaimers of and legalese were not posted. I'm not a moron. On and on and on. Love this one. I just burned all the calories of this wine I'm drinking by reading this one product review. It is a low-calorie wine. It's fermented to dry.

SPEAKER_01 52:32

So you're it's delicious. Okay. It's good.

unknown 52:34

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 52:36

Find a better one. Mine is WMA Blue Amazon Kindle Waterproof Case Cover Protective Bag Pouch. Yes. I do love the SEO of this uh title. All of the words. Great SEO in this article. Uh five stars. Hoping it'd be crap. Her kindle would slip out and electrocute her. This is written by Ben Harrison. Verified purchase. Got this for the mother-in-law for bathtime, hoping it'd be crap. Her kindle would slip out and electrocute her. So far, this bloody thing is staying in one piece. Great for waterproof kindling, crap for murder. That's the second review in this article about murder, using a product for murder, just so you know. I'm very uh very big on murder.

SPEAKER_00 53:17

On murder products. Alright, this one's funny because um I hear Tyler talk about it all the time. Star Wars Battlefront, Deluxe Edition, PlayStation 4. Ooh, love it. This is a one, and so this is on a um a video game. One star review by Amazon customer. Congratulations, EA. You earned one star. Additional stars, dot dot dot. So it's all it says, and I'm doing this one because it is short and I need to breathe. Congratulations, EA. You earned one star. Additional stars can be purchased for $5.49 each, which I believe is a reference to all the in-game purchases that now stupid games are doing.

SPEAKER_01 53:56

Loot boxes.

SPEAKER_00 53:57

Is that what it's called? Yep. We learned when Elliot accidentally purchased something for way too much money in a game, and we're like, no more games with in-app purchases because yeah, Tyler said you pay like $70, $60 or something for these games, and then you're paying $5 for everything else in it. Is that right?

SPEAKER_01 54:13

Yeah, and then they remaster it and you pay for it again. Like me and massive. Oh my god, yes. Take my money, it looks so much better.

SPEAKER_00 54:21

But I will do it.

SPEAKER_01 54:22

Good times. Uh my uh, I have a six-foot Buddha Maitraya the Christ Copper Meditation Pyramid System for healing, polished copper connectors with four-inch capstone from Buddha Maitreya the Christ Shambhala healing tools. What? Um, so this is uh a tent. A well, that's not a tent. It's a pyramid uh of copper things. Like you'd put a tent over it, but there's no tent. There's no there's no canvas. There's no tent? Uh Joseph R. Fanning, all caps, uh, gave it one star saying incomplete item. This tent was missing its stakes, tarp, and fly cover. I had to cover it in vines and leaves for my camping trip. And I got soaked overnight when it rained. Coincidentally, my hepatitis is now gone. I love the very subtle shot at the bullshit of the healing thing. Uh, and I love he's very self-aware of making fun of himself for thinking this was a tent.

SPEAKER_00 55:20

I mean, do you think he was actually making fun of himself for thinking it was a tent?

SPEAKER_01 55:24

No, because it's not a verified purchase. So he just like reviewed it without buying it. But I I love it. I like I like the self-awareness. I like I like I like when people give give themselves a little bit.

SPEAKER_00 55:34

Do you think that people like go around writing these reviews like they just pick random products and do it for our entertainment?

SPEAKER_01 55:41

People like Tyler and myself do Well, there's actually a there actually is a Reddit where people do challenges on this.

SPEAKER_00 55:46

Oh, we're gonna do this again.

SPEAKER_01 55:47

Um I think we need to do it once a month. I you know, I write all the shelf talkers for the store. And um there's some that are like very subtle jabs at people that make me chuckle every time. There's a code to the colors I use of ink to write stuff to. Oh my god. That I'm waiting for someone to figure out.

SPEAKER_00 56:04

Oh well, now I'm gonna spend a lot of time figuring this out.

SPEAKER_01 56:07

Um but I'm busy at work for the next month. Uh there's some very subtle jabs about like this is a great selling wine. That's it's not. No, that means it is. It means like it's crap.

SPEAKER_00 56:19

This wine is bullshit.

SPEAKER_01 56:21

There's nothing to say about it other than people buy it. Now you know everybody. So I like this. I like this art of like say it's a crap product. It's a ridiculous product.

SPEAKER_00 56:31

I like it. Um, okay, I'm gonna read this one because I have seen this on a million product review sites. It's the Hutzler 571 Banana Slicer. Oh, I love this one. I've seen this, like when I think of funny product reviews, I think of this product. So this got five stars. Saved My Marriage by Mrs. Toledo. Scott's wife? I know. What can I say about the 571 B banana slicer that hasn't already been said about the wheel, penicillin, or the iPhone? This is one of the greatest inventions of all time. My husband and I would argue constantly over who had to cut the day's banana slices. It's one of those chores no one wants to do. You know, the old, I spent the entire day rearing our children. Maybe you can pitch in a little and cut these bananas. And of course, you think I have the energy to slave over your damn bananas? I worked a 12-hour shift just to come home to this. She should have put uncut bananas. These are the things that can destroy an entire relationship. Nick doesn't like my gesticulation. No, I love it. Like, this is a gesticulating episode. I am an uh actor over here. These are the things that can destroy an entire relationship. It got to the point where our children could sense the tension. The minute I heard our six-year-old girl in her bedroom reenacting our daily banana fight with her Barbie dolls, I knew we had to make a change. That's when I found the 571B Banana Slicer. Our marriage has never been healthier, and we've even incorporated it into our lovemaking. Thanks, 571B Banana Slicer.

SPEAKER_01 58:02

Speaking of love making, I got one right here. Honey mail chassis device, metal wire cage, 40 millimeter, 45 millimeter, and 50 millimeter. Okay, first of all, I know inches, not millimeters, so I would need to do some uh converting on which size to buy here. But uh also, honey mail, like clearly horny male. Um let me describe this thing to you. Um it looks like can we say uh C-O-C-K-R-A-N-G on this? Sure. Okay, it looks like a cock ring. Um but then You just spelled it. It's like um it starts with that, and then it's it's like a wire cage to put your junk in. Um it looks really ridiculous. Just your penis, not your balls. So not the full junk. Um and it's curved down, so it fits with if for flaccid, and like if if it if it was not flaccid, if it was erect, it would seem to be very painful. Um, so this review is from James Schreiber. It's not verified, so you know who knows? But five stars keeps my son from sinning. My son is going through be starting puberty in the next year. Actually, this might be legit because this sounds like someone from Alabama, and this seems like something. Uh my son is going through B-Starting Puberty in the next year, so since his father left me. Oh, and it's a woman writing this, but it's a James Shrine. Yeah, this is definitely she bought this. This is a fake. No, this is she bought it. Like on the father's account, she don't know how to get no Amazon, but you know, uh, since his father left me and I'm now racing him on my own. I bought one of these for him to wear when he's not being supervised. It is well made, and I made sure he's unable to take it off without moving the lock. I know it is a great product because he absolutely hates it. I don't enjoy seeing him unhappy, but I enjoy the peace of mind knowing that he isn't messing around at school, sitting at night. And most of all, I'm glad he's remaining pure for the Lord. He is coming today's eight years until he's old enough to join the seminary and be able to take him off. Great product, thanks again. I feel like these people are serious. I do too.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:08

Okay, I feel like this is. This is a real one. This is a real one. I feel like this person was like, this saved my kid's life. Dude, also, why would someone buy that? Well, to keep your son pure from the Lord, obviously. Right. Not being targeted. What do you think we're gonna get targeted with after this?

SPEAKER_01 1:00:25

So, uh, you buy one for Elliot? Uh nope, I'm busy. All right. It comes, does it come with the padlock on it? Could you imagine? So, like it has a padlock on the top. So, like you're watching.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:40

I feel like um the noise might be stifled by your denim.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:46

No, not that noise. I I don't know. Maybe denim, but like if you're wearing shorts. You're right. I bet he's not allowed to wear shorts. Probably not. It feels like he's wearing denim. Have you seen the um the TikTok of like it's like start it's like a duo type of situation, like join the Mile High Club, it's people in first close and like closing the thing off, and then it cuts this lady that's in her other seat, and she just hears no and she starts clapping too, thinking it's a landing. No, I love the it's very funny.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:18

What are the this is the shit people spend their time? Like, what is TikTok doing to us? Yeah, I know.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:23

Okay, sorry. Speaking of okay, so like it's very funny. I got like a five seconds worth of chuckle out of it, but it took like 45 minutes to create. Well, yes. And you didn't make any money off of it.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:32

Maybe they did though. They didn't. You know what? I got stuck watching some idiots that clearly like live in a TikTok house and they or you know, rent a TikTok TikTok house. And um, yeah, they do. They're like, we're having a content day today. I'm like, but do you have a job? And content creation is a job. Don't get on me about that. But these kids are like, I don't know if they're ever gonna have real jobs besides making TikTok videos, which I guess maybe will is a real job because we're all consuming it. Whoa, my mind is blown. Are we in the matrix? Yes, yes, yes. Okay, you got one more accoutrement's horse head mask. And it's really too bad you can't see it because it's like this crazy ass-looking horse. Like, yeah. Anyway, another five-star review saved my life. Okay, and it was written by John Neal. This is a serious one. I'm reading it because it's kind of feels like something our government would do. When I turned state's witness, they didn't have enough money to put me in the witch witness protection program. See, don't you feel like this would be a good one?

SPEAKER_01 1:02:34

There's another one about this one.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:35

Oh, there is? Yeah. Oh, well, okay, so to put me in the witness protection program. So they bought me this mask and gave me a list of suggested places to move. Since then, I've lived my life in peace and safety, knowing that my old identity is forever obscured by this life-saving item. And it is a fucking crazy ass looking horse. What? Can we talk about food? Yeah, I thought you said there was another one. Oh no. Oh, not in this article. Okay, okay. Food it is.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:02

I got two. One is Sarah's making and one is mine.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:06

Oh, a product recommendation move down here, huh?

SPEAKER_01 1:03:09

Yes, yes, yes, yes. Uh, so we got a blackstone grill because uh we're gonna use it for cooking a lot of brats. And uh it's a flat iron, uh a flat top cast iron thing. So you have to season it, you have to cook on it to keep it nonstick. So, of course, I took it to my house to do all that, and I'm trying some things out because like they're very popular with people. I'm like, let's see if it's legit or not. Um, and so far I've enjoyed it. Like, because it's such a large work surface, there's definitely things you can do on it that are not practical inside your house. Sure. Even with like the big cast iron thing over your burners. Um, the heat's very even, which is nice. Uh does there's there's some very nice things about it, and there's some things where you're like, eh, I mean, it's just, you know, like eh. Um, but anyway. I want to make like a cheesesteak sandwich. I did that last time. Oh, you did? And it was very good. It was very yummy. Um, so I had this brisket that it was not the best that I've ever done. Uh, but I chopped it up with some peppers and onions and like melted the cheese on top of it on this thing, and was able to like my first sandwich wasn't great, my second, like I learned, uh, made more stuff, and then you take two things and scoop it and put it on the toasted bun. Yeah. And it was like quite good. So it was fun. I made uh hash browns are really good on it. I will say that. Oh, I can imagine. You have like all this, like if you do it in a cast iron skillet, you don't have enough space to really get them, like you can't make enough to have because hash browns cook down so much, you could like you just don't have enough space. Okay. So like the hash browns are really good, and I did like a hash with it, and that was just like delicious. So good. Yep. Um, so like it's a specialized tool for sure.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:44

But I've been impressed with it, and I've made some things that were very tasty.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:47

Is it gonna be great for our brats?

SPEAKER_01 1:04:49

I think it's gonna work. I think it's gonna be really good for the people cooking the brats. Oh, okay. For Nick. Okay. I mean, it'll be fine. The brats already cooked. You just need to like warm it up and make it brown.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:04

All right, man, whatever you say. I I'm here for whatever you want.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:07

There's gonna be less fire, Bridget. Great, less fire. Serving, great. Every time we do anything, you're like, Nick, I just want less fire. I want less puking and less fire. No, I don't care about the fire. I don't want. Nick, please don't let anything on fire.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:23

Please be on time and don't puke. That's what I want. Be on time, no morning sickness. That's my request for tomorrow. I mean, no promises. Well, there have been a few events where I'm like, I go sit down for 30 minutes. He literally has to walk outside. But tomorrow we're gonna be outside, so if you're gonna puke, just go in the construction hall. And you know, the good thing is Topsy Turvy's gonna be there.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:43

So can puke in the beer or no, I'm just gonna like down three beers and be like doesn't feel like that's gonna help at six AM.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:51

Well, we are sponsoring a uh half marathon tomorrow, we should tell you. Uh we're serving the food at the post race party and beer with Topsy Turvy. So we have to be there quite early. Um As the post-race party begins at 8 15. Disgustingly early. I mean, I like it because I'm up already. So let's just go. Let's get the day rolling. Uh yeah. It goes 8 30 to noon. And so we've got to schlep some brats, man. But we've got all kinds of volunteers this year.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:15

So I think we can just truck through the construction zone at this point, right? Oh God, it's so annoying.

SPEAKER_00 1:06:20

What if we forget something? It's gonna take us like 45 extra minutes. Let's not forget.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:25

Sarah has to deal with this every day going to daycare. It's the worst. I think you have to do it going from my parents. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:06:31

Well, no, I don't really. Yeah, I just go a different way. From the middle school to yeah. I'm done with that. Okay, uh, more cake. Your wife's making. Is she in a midlife crisis making cakes?

SPEAKER_01 1:06:39

No, it's a great activity for Simona. Oh. We do it as like a craft. Oh, yes. An edible craft instead of like more crap to put up on your refrigerator. You put it in your refrigerator instead of on. Sure, sure. Uh for the 4th of July, Sarah and Simona made an incredible America cake. It was strawberry cake, so pink, you know, which was like perfect for this whole thing. Cool whip. And then you make an American flag out of blueberries and strawberries. Beautiful. Did you see it on the Instagram? No. I'm gonna show you. Sounds delicious. It's a picture of Simona with her shirt off because she got it dirty while she was doing it, and Sarah looking happy that they managed to get this craft done.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:15

This craft. I love that you're calling it a craft. It was a craft. I mean, I get that it is a craft, an edible craft. Let's see, where is it? We had dump cakes, which were so good and so easy. Oh, cute. And it was actually really yummy. Whoa, her hair looks red there.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:31

Yeah, she probably has some redhead in her from all of us. We're both I was a big redhead. You were? Yep. The cake was I looked like Bennett until like age seven or eight. Oh. Long curly red hair.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:43

Whoa. That's baffling.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:44

Bennett is one of her brothers-in-laws. Brothers-in-laws. That's true.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:48

Okay, great. Um, more photos of kids eating cake.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:52

With their shirts off. Basically, this is Lucy.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:54

I was like, Lucy walks around the house naked whenever we let her. I'm naked! Okay, that's not even Kid Corner, guys. Um, no surprise here. I'm telling you about cheese. We had Mr. P's grilled cheese, which is an outstanding food truck. What, Nick?

SPEAKER_01 1:08:11

I came across a thing I had for a segment after the break. Next week, bro. No, no, no. This is a real quick one. Okay. We're gonna talk about $10 million right now in your hand, but there's a catch. A snail is chasing you for the rest of your life, and if it touches you, you die a terrible death. The snail cannot be killed. It knows your location at all times. Its only purpose is to find you. Do you take the money?

SPEAKER_00 1:08:38

I mean, I would die because I have to sleep. Can I capture the snail?

SPEAKER_01 1:08:43

This is the Reddit thread.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:45

Okay, well, yeah, I can capture the snail. It doesn't say the snail has superpowers. I'm just gonna like put a pan on top of it. There you go. Problem solved, you idiots.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:55

I thought you would be really creeped out by the idea of a snail concentrating. This is kind of disgusting.

SPEAKER_00 1:09:00

But I'm faster than a snail. But I'm not saying I'm smarter. I feel like snails are like gonna be those, like the weird species that takes over the world. You're right. Not if they're under a pan. Actually, what I envisioned is those um precisely like our tall deli tub containers. Because then I can watch him because it's clear plastic. So I can watch the snail if it ever sneaks out. Your gesture. I can watch it. Don't kill me, snail. Okay. Anyway, I had some grilled cheese. So Mr. P's grilled cheese is uh run by a guy named Ty, a young gentleman. Uh they're super kind, great. They're from Palmyra. Uh, they came down for our first beer picnic of the season, which was a beautiful day after like so many days of rain. Uh, beautiful day. And I had the grilled mac and cheese grilled cheese. I don't know what it was called. I can't remember, but it is macaroni and cheese and grilled cheese. And it was the best thing because I love the texture. I love our macaroni and cheese broth at work. I love the noodle texture in my other meals. Uh, someone told me it was too much starch. It's called the Mac Daddy Sandwich. Mac Daddy sandwich. It's only $7. It's only $7 and it was delicious. And it comes with a tomato bisque little dipper. And this the little dipper was perfect with the mac and cheese sandwich. Just a great bite. If Mr. Pease is at any of your events around your area, go see them. They're booked up all fall. They're like um, you know, a house food truck at Apple Brown Winery. They're at Dusterbeck's a lot. They're awesome. Best thing I ate this week.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:28

Maybe at some more like Gina Country events. Maybe. Uh I had the Rosalita also do it. Which is tomato, onion, garlic spread topped with mozzarella and gouda.

SPEAKER_00 1:10:37

Tyler got the gyro and the bacon one that Ellie just like ate the bacon off of.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:43

I did like how well of an Elliot job Ellie did of eating the.

SPEAKER_00 1:10:48

She just like left it on the table and it came back. I was like, yeah, sorry.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:51

Well, no, I was like, because I was kind of like, I thought maybe Simona ate it because of the way it looked eaten.

SPEAKER_00 1:10:56

No, that's my six-year-old son. Oh, could I eat it? I was about to just spoil something, but I have like a hundred kid corners. I couldn't decide between. Weird.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:05

All right. Well then. It's time for kid corner corner. Uh do you want to do one and I'll do mine and then you can do another one? Well, yeah, maybe. Or you just want to do all of your supposed.

SPEAKER_00 1:11:14

No, I'm just gonna stick with one here that I know, and if I feel so inclined, I'll add another. Elliot had for one of his summer classes um a firefighter, junior firefighter class, which like big huge shout out to the Lake Cheney Fire Department because they're awesome.

SPEAKER_02 1:11:27

I do a lot of really cool things.

SPEAKER_00 1:11:28

Um they really truly care about the community. I know the fire churches. I know they're one of their lieutenants, and they truly just like want to be part of the community. So they take um for free.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:37

And they don't have that like we serve you. You like they just literally are a group of cool people.

SPEAKER_00 1:11:44

Open the garage doors, let the kids come in and see the fire trucks because they're located right downtown. Kids live around there. Anyway, they're awesome. So they did a class at the middle school for free, and um Elliot was a certified junior firefighter. So they had like a graduation, got a certificate, a t-shirt, a hat, um, a little badge, like which seems stupid to everyone except a six-year-old who was so in love with it. Well, in the middle of the graduation, like I didn't know what they learned, it wasn't there, but graduation excuse was like, you know, 20 minutes long, and they had to do like a fire crawl, like when you're if you're down on the ground and you have to crawl, and they called Elliot up out of the crowd of these like 20 kids and like Elliot, and he booked it across the floor, army crawling. Like, I was like, they're like, No, no, you can stop. You stop at this red line. No, you can stop. And he just kept going, and it was the weirdest. I was like, I'm impressed, but also this is so weird looking because he he cooked. Man, I have a video, I'll show you. So it was my uh proud slash very weird, but also like you got you got picked out of class for army crawling. Everybody's good at something. He's gonna be safe in a fire. They like quiz you when they call you up to give you a certificate. They like ask you a question like, if you're on the second floor of your house, this is what they asked, Elliot. You know, and you need to let a firefighter know you're there. What do you do? And I say, you dangle something out of your window and you scream help. And I'm like, shit.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:04

Good job. When I see Elliot, I'm gonna ask him, Elliot, your house is on fire. What do you do? He will know.

SPEAKER_00 1:13:09

They had to memorize their address um in case they had to call, they had to talk about like their neighborhood safe spots. It was great. I'm just saying, shout out to this amazing, amazing free class that every kid should be taking. Yeah, it was great. So anyway.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:23

Mine comes from this morning. Simona wakes up, she's moving in her crib. Like uh, the entire household actually slept late. I don't know why. I think started ours, actually. Because it's overcast, so like no sun, you know. It's like great. And we all wake up to like, oh, Simona's yelling. Oh, yeah. You know, and like kicking her crib, whatever. And so we're like, I'm like, okay, I'll go. Because Sarah's does more in the morning, like 100% Sarah, you know. So I was like, you go get like go potty and like brush your teeth. Take a breath, you know, and like I'll go change diaper and you know, all that stuff. And so I go over there and I walk in, she goes, Daddy, I'm mad at you.

SPEAKER_00 1:14:04

Oh, good morning.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:05

I'm like, the fuck? I haven't. I'm like, oh, I'm sorry, Simona, what's wrong? She's like, I want mommy. I'm mad at you. What did I do? And she goes, You're not mommy. Oh, that's right. I'm just like, okay, bye. Bye, bitch. I'll go back to bed. So I walked away. That's funny. She's never told me she's mad at me before. Oh no. This was the first one. Oh shit. So it was really heartbreaking. Buckle up, dad. And um, very heartbreaking. My girl is, you know, my little baby girl. Uh she's becoming bigger. I know it's gonna happen a lot. Uh I might just give her a credit card now so she can't be mad at me. No. No. Wrong answer. Sarah laughed at me because she's like, yeah, that's right. She used, she's like, you should be proud of her because she used her logic to tell you why she was mad at you. I'm like, you're kind of right. Like I taught her a lesson. She actually did like, you know, say, like, I'm mad at you because, and like, I wanted my mom, and you're not my mom, and you're I'm mad at you because of that. Um, so like, props to Simona. Like, yeah, I mean, like, I don't like it, but but you know, she uh learned something. She wasn't like mad at me because I was wearing purple and she wanted me to wear pink.

SPEAKER_00 1:15:17

You're right. So she's mad because you're not mom. Okay, it's reasonable, it's rational.

SPEAKER_01 1:15:23

Yeah, like she wanted her mom. Good job. Good job. Sarah's more nourishing than I am.

SPEAKER_00 1:15:28

We all have our strengths, Nick.

SPEAKER_01 1:15:30

Nourishing is not.

SPEAKER_00 1:15:33

Um, I'm good with kid corners. The rest of these are just silly stories I was writing. There's a bird in your garage? Uh, that's my parents' garage. My parents uh pulled some trees right around the door to their garage, like the people door to their garage. And they believe there was a bird's nest in there, and they pissed off some birds. So a couple times there has been a bird that has then got into that door. Uh-oh, like when you open it, whatever, and it it dive bombs you. Oh, yeah. So Elliot has been with, because my mom helps with him a lot in the summer. And so Elliot is pretty sensitive and um panics a little bit. So he was at my mom's the other day and he wanted a popsicle, which was in the freezer outside in the garage, one of the extra, like the extra freezer, you know. And he put he has this huge circular, like cake Tupperware lid, and he kept it on the counter. I'm like, mom, like, what is this tupperware on the counter? Elliot puts it on his head to go to the garage, and it was hysterical. But again, logical. Like, that's a really smart makeshift helmet. If a bird's gonna dive bomb your head, you're definitely gonna freak out and it's gonna fall off, but still. And he lost another tooth today. So there you go. Those are all the stories. Yeah, this morning pulled, like pulled it out of his mouth because it was bloody.

SPEAKER_01 1:16:46

So there you go, guys. Um, I'm trying to license the rights to something for a segment after the break that you just reminded me of.

SPEAKER_00 1:16:54

Oh, good. Well, I'm glad you stuck in, hopefully, with my like inability to talk because I was laughing so hard, but I really needed that giggle today. So thanks. I mean, it was hilarious.

SPEAKER_01 1:17:05

We're gonna go do some other stuff.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:06

Yeah, get ready for our big race tomorrow. Hope you enjoyed this. Have a wonderful week.

SPEAKER_01 1:17:14

I don't know. Control what you can control, change your Apple Watch faces. Have a wonderful week. Blessings.