Christmas Mad Libs - Dinner Plus Drinks #104

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Hello, everybody. Welcome to a not quite our last episode before Christmas. Christmas episode of Dinner Plus Drinks. Fallala. If you are not watching on YouTube, you're missing out. We always say it, but this is the one. Bridget is super de duperty festive today.

SPEAKER_00 0:17

I mean, I think some people wear this for real. I might wear this for real. Just a plaid blazer. It's pretty hip. Yep. Nick is keep staying silent over there. I did bring many other uglier options. I think this one could be like, you know, Ralph Loren probably designed something like this. You're actually right.

SPEAKER_01 0:33

I didn't think of it that way. Now, if you would have told me you picked it up from the thrift shop from Ralph Loren, I would be like, No, wow, Bridget, so stylish.

SPEAKER_00 0:44

Um, it's not Ralph Loren, it's some tag. I've never heard of it. But I do have a Pendleton one like this from a thrift store. Wow. Oh yeah. Pendleton's one of my favorite things to find at the thrift. But anyway, this is therapy. It's the Christmas season, and we really need extra therapy. So thanks for hanging with us.

SPEAKER_01 1:10

We had some struggles today about what to drink. Sure did. You know, that's a first world problem of ours. After the disaster of two weeks ago of the Christmas wine. Oh boy. We knew we needed something festive themed. Um, but the only options were a Christmas blush. No, thank you. And a the white wine version of that Christmas wine, which I opened and sampled. And um He wouldn't even make me drink it. It was like Welsh's white grape juice. Not even Welsh's purple grape juice.

SPEAKER_00 1:39

Don't recommend feeding to your children.

SPEAKER_01 1:40

So Bridget instead came up with the idea of let's have an old-fashioned cocktail and show off what could be an amazing gift.

SPEAKER_00 1:48

Yes, I love these as gifts. I just like can't get over it because they're new this year in store. They are new. Yeah. Uh Tattersall, which is in Minnesota. So our neighbors. And also River Falls, Wisconsin now. Oh, yes. I did forget that. Um, yeah, they have these adorable little stocking stuffer-sized pre-made cocktails. So old fashioned, and they have a Manhattan one, right?

SPEAKER_01 2:08

They do. So this is a rye old-fashioned. What's cool about Tattersall, among many things, is they make their own liqueurs, which is fairly unusual for distilleries. That's usually kind of more just like a specialized thing. And since they make their own, they can then combine their spirit, their rye whiskey, with their liqueur and have ready-to-go actual alcoholic drinks. A lot of the pre-made cocktails that you get, or we try, they're made by like wine companies or places that use things that aren't the actual alcohol spirit and the actual liqueur, it's flavorings. If you're a distillery that makes both, which is challenging to do and time consuming, you can make your own ready-to-go cocktail. So this is a no-joke, 70-proof, 35% alcohol, rye old-fashioned. Now, the thing with this is that it is a little not as sweet as this Wisconsin it's like. So I'm gonna sweeten it up a little bit with another great gift idea, which is from our friends at Tapped Maple Syrup, their old-fashioned cocktail syrup. So this is a maple syrup with uh bitter cube bitters and uh some other stuff. So it's like old-fashioned flavoring that you would pour into your whiskey for a ready-to-go cocktail. And to sweeten it up a little bit, uh, because I know Bridget likes a little bit sweeter old-fashioned.

SPEAKER_00 3:24

Because I just smelled it and already was like, ho.

SPEAKER_01 3:27

This is for you guys. I'm gonna pour in some of our tapped old-fashioned cocktail syrup. I do love tapped. Shake your own. Shake your own. Cheers.

SPEAKER_00 3:38

Cheers, happy holidays. Happy holidays. Oh, yeah, it's much, I mean, much more my style with syrup in it.

SPEAKER_01 3:46

Syrup makes everything more delicious. Mmm, just like elf. So these would be two great gift ideas. You can stop by Lake Shaneva Cutcher Meets for both. Uh, tapped, you can also buy directly from them. Jeremy and Abby Solon uh and their family up in the Stevens Point area are lovely people. They have a huge variety of flavored syrups and gift boxes and things like that.

SPEAKER_00 4:05

So I was making a post about them today, and I was like, I can't possibly pick one of their amazing products. So I didn't. I put a sampler pack out there.

SPEAKER_01 4:13

So I probably shouldn't be drinking because I'm getting my COVID booster shot in two and a half hours.

SPEAKER_00 4:18

And I am scheduling mine as we are.

SPEAKER_01 4:20

And I gotta admit, I'm a little anxious? A little anxious. Yeah. Uh this is also how my life is. I scheduled it so that if I feel bad, I will be out on Saturday because it's kind of the best time for me to be on my butt. Except for your wife. And so it sucks for Sarah, but she really wanted me to get the booster ASAP, so I think she understands.

SPEAKER_00 4:41

Yeah, good job, Sarah.

SPEAKER_01 4:42

So but I'm hoping nothing too bad. It's been a little hit and miss with my friends.

SPEAKER_00 4:48

I was like, my hands are getting sweaty. I actually just had this conversation with my mom because a year ago, my mom and I both had COVID, and we're like both clearly going through some PTSD about it. And um, there's COVID again around everywhere because I just feel like Omicron seems like it's just getting everybody. It feels like it's getting everybody, it's less deadly, which is great, but it's getting a lot of kids, and so it's very close to our life again this Christmas. And so I was lecturing my mom about a booster, and we both are like, okay, maybe if we schedule it Tuesday, we can be sick Wednesday and then okay for Christmas still.

SPEAKER_01 5:23

The what's really driving me nuts about Omicron more than anything is sports because all of these athletes are getting it. The uh Cleveland Browns have like 35 people on the COVID list. Really? Um, soccer games are getting canceled, and I just think this is indicative of our society in general, where we're like, oh, you know, we're gonna test these people that are all vaccinated and are the healthiest people in the world. And if they have it, they're going to have to sit out of a football game. But we're gonna let all of the fans not be vaccinated, not wear face masks, and stand each other in close quarters in the stadium for four hours.

SPEAKER_00 6:00

And let all our kids go to school still.

SPEAKER_01 6:02

It it makes no sense. And yeah, wherever you fall on the spectrum, I'm tired of it.

SPEAKER_00 6:09

Yeah, this is a tough one to like read. I know we're we we are starting our Christmas episode with COVID talk, but I am like baffled at the world. I was a couple late, a couple minutes late to our recordings, I ran into my sister downtown on my drive out here, and she was just like, I am mad. I am like mad at society. And I'm like, me too, because I'm not saving this for the news story. This fucking TikTok challenge, and yes, I'm sorry if there were children listening, I should have warned you. This TikTok challenge that's going on, like we had to get a note from our school to say, hey, by the way, TikTok idiots are telling idiot kids to bring weapons to school and like encourage destruction at school today, like the day that we're recording. Our high school has already released because there was, you know, some sort of stayed out. It's just insane. So again, WTF world.

SPEAKER_01 7:01

I'm so sick and tired of TikTok. It is so clearly causing crime. All these challenges of kids going and like hitting a stranger in a grocery store. You know what? You should get shot for that. I I'm not, I'm not even sorry. I am the like, don't, you know, property can be replaced, everything. But if you're purposefully going and punching people to get internet points and you get shot and you're killed, I don't feel bad for you. I don't even really feel that bad for your family because they should have raised you better.

SPEAKER_00 7:26

I mean, the world. I don't have any uh we could do an hour episode on this, but we're not gonna get off my lawn. I actually get off TikTok, okay?

SPEAKER_01 7:34

Get it off. You know, it really could be China's attempt to sabotage America from the inside.

SPEAKER_00 7:39

And it's working.

SPEAKER_01 7:40

It is working. I mean, it's crazy what an authoritarian government single-mindedly bent on the destruction of America can do. I can't believe how strong this cocktail is. Well, it is 35%. It is getting watered down. There's some ice in there, there's a syrup.

SPEAKER_00 7:53

I am used to like these canned cocktail things being garbage. This is this is quality. Okay. That was my smooth transition out of depressing things.

SPEAKER_01 8:01

The other thing I went and did that was not depressing was Noel Milwaukee. It's this indoor lights thing. And I we were we went out to breakfast earlier this week with some friends. And uh, by we, I mean you and I. Oh, I was like, was I there? And I was like, oh, I need to save this for the podcast. And so I didn't, uh and then we just talked about it anyway because I needed to know. It was too long. Uh, and I didn't want you to buy tickets necessarily. I know I'm not going to. Uh so you might see it all over social media, and it's this indoor light show in the Expo Center at the Wisconsin State Fair Park, and it's all these beautiful photo opportunities to put on TikTok or Instagram or Facebook or Snapchat or MySpace or Google ⁇ .

SPEAKER_00 8:44

Google Plus.

SPEAKER_01 8:46

Whatever social media platform you like, Twitter. Um, and we went and Simona had a nice time. She got, we were hoping to get two hours out of it because we thought, you know, there's all these places. They did a very good job with their promos of making this thing look massive and just like you can explore and experience things.

SPEAKER_00 9:04

But Nick's never worked at a convention center like me.

SPEAKER_01 9:08

Well, I mean, they didn't use all of the um It doesn't matter. They didn't use all of the Expo Center, they could have used the space a lot better. They didn't fill it quite right, and they had a lot of wasted dead space, and it was fine in the words of I can't remember exactly the joke, but I was whelmed. I wasn't underwhelmed, I wasn't overwhelmed. It was I like that. Um, just whelming. And it was frustrating because it like has so much potential, and there's I wish Bridget would have been there because you would have been like I would have ripped it apart.

SPEAKER_00 9:40

Well, I I just feel like, and this is what I said to Nick when he was telling me about it. I just feel like since last year all of these like light show things blew up because it was COVID, right? Um, so I just feel like people are everyone's trying to do it this year, and not everyone's gonna do it great, and that's what this was. Like it was, it was good, but you're just trying too hard too fast because last year was such a success. So I am much more into the drive-thru lights show where like I don't have to be around other screaming children. That is like no thanks that the parents may or may not be paying attention to them and they may or may not be coughing on me. And so we just like illegally drive through lights shows with our kids unbuckled, and like we give them hot chocolate and kind of like lay out a bed in the backseat of the car and let them mess around. That's what we like to do.

SPEAKER_01 10:23

That's a good idea. I think we might do that. If you can get the half-price tickets to Noelle Milwaukee, I would say do it. Do it. Uh, it's go in with just like, oh yeah, we're gonna get a couple pictures and hang out a little bit. Like the food and Bev were like bad, but that's on state fair. Yeah, like that's a restrictive contract. And I bet like the way the deal with the union there works is just also horribly restrictive. Yeah. Um, and the shopping was like not subpar. Yeah, what it could be. And I felt bad. It was like kind of a vendor fair and kind of official shop, and the official shop was nice, but like needed to be bigger. Oh. And because it was like very well themed and very well staffed.

SPEAKER_00 10:58

And I just thought it was all a vendor fair.

SPEAKER_01 11:01

Yeah, and then it was like a vendor fair, and the vendor fair, like these poor people were bored out of their skulls, which I get. It was it wasn't that bad in terms of how crowded it was, um, which some of that I think was they limited it, and some of it maybe was it's not selling as fast. So, like, if you went signed up for his things thinking it'd be like a hundred thousand people, you would be disappointed. And Santa Claus also was like bored out of his skull. Yeah, that sucks. And instead of like taking more time with each individual kid, and you know, like really, he was just kind of like, Why am I here? What am I doing?

SPEAKER_00 11:33

It's like mall Santa. I had to go into a mall the other day, and it was so weird. And there was a mall Santa, but he was good. I almost waited in line, but I was by myself. I thought that'd be weird. That wouldn't be weird, Bridget. It was just me. I had no one to take my photo. It was just, I had to get something from a department store. Oh my god. And I'm not an online like first this thing I was spending a decent amount of money on. I needed to like see it and feel it and touch it and find it. And it was an awful experience. Department stores are awful.

SPEAKER_01 11:59

My uncle has a band, a jazz band, down in the Dallas Metroplex. And they play all sorts of gigs from they started this over COVID of like they were playing like on trailers outside of like in cul-de-sacks and stuff as like neighborhood outdoor concerts. And they play like, you know, at restaurants and at festivals and stuff. And he posted Texas Jazz Cats. I'll put a link up. You should follow them on social media. Texas Jazz Cats playing at it, wasn't Galleria North, which is a mall people have heard of, but it's something like that. It's like in McKinney. Uh like blah, blah, blah mall. And I'm just like, what's a mall? Because I've literally never and he's like, I know you're making fun of me for being old on this one, but this is like the one mall in the entire Metroplex that has managed to survive, and it's actually cool. And like they do all this programming stuff, and it's more of an experience than I mean, I like malls than a place to shop.

SPEAKER_00 12:48

Liked malls. Um, like I was a mall of America person. I went to the malls, like we used to go to the mall for an after after school activity. Like, I like malls, it's just clearly no one has staff, so like staff is standing at the register but not helping anywhere else in the store, and you can't find shit in a department. Like, anyway, it was stressful.

SPEAKER_01 13:06

Um Have you seen all of the stuff on Milwaukee's point out about the downfall of Grand Avenue these days?

SPEAKER_00 13:11

Well, Grand Avenue is becoming the market hall.

SPEAKER_01 13:14

Yeah, like and so they're recapping all of like their coverage over the last 30 years of.

SPEAKER_00 13:18

I used to park at Grand Avenue Mall because it was connected by Skywalk to my office and it was way cheaper. I know how bad Grand Avenue has been through the year.

SPEAKER_01 13:26

But it's just funny to see like how uh they had an article from 1988 that it won like Mall of the Year and was like marketed by Visit Milwaukee as like one of the top five reasons to come. Yeah, it's crazy because it was, you know, like an indoor arcade of malls connected by a beautiful skylight with options to walk everywhere. It was like this innovative thing.

SPEAKER_00 13:45

Walking. I will say here's my memory of Grand Avenue. I went to a Catholic private small grade school here, and we went on a field trip to the Milwaukee Public Museum, and then we had lunch at the food court in the mall. Oh, nice. And our teachers were like, okay, children, outside the mall, there are going to be people that want to talk to you about the Bible and Jesus. Don't listen to them. Don't stop and talk to them. And of course, we all did. Like, we're all outside the mall. That's what I remember about Grand Ave as a kid. That's what people told me. I was like, okay, everybody. And then I lived there, and like those people were my buddies.

SPEAKER_01 14:19

I have to tell you about this news article I found. Great. It is incredible. Okay. Absolutely very excited. I saw this on Reddit, of course. Of course. In Not the Onion subreddit, which would make you, you know, it's a bunch of things that you think are the onion, which I know is your favorite. So you would think it's a joke, but it is not. And the headline is Topic Cell experts will battle it out in an esports-like competition this weekend. And this was last weekend. Diramuid Early from New York City. Anub Agawal from India. And Andrew Nye from London.

SPEAKER_00 15:05

London?

SPEAKER_01 15:06

They have a World Rankings of Excel. Diramid, the white American dude, is in first place, which right away. Not so sure if those world rankings are right.

SPEAKER_00 15:16

I'm not sure Diramid is American.

SPEAKER_01 15:20

Well, he's from New York City. Maybe he's Scottish. I don't know. Anyway, um, but uh they have a spreadsheeting competition where you have to come up with you know formulas. It's 128 participants, uh, and they have to do all sorts of weird spreadsheet things. I love a good spreadsheet. I know you love a good spreadsheet. Is it your dream to be in this? No, this is like loser fact.

SPEAKER_00 15:44

Yeah, this is pretty bad.

SPEAKER_01 15:45

Uh let's see, who won? Who won? I think it's here. In the end, Australia's Andrew quote unquote end goat, Nai, edged Michael Jarmin disappointing the Jarmy's army that followed the Jarmy's army Canada's entrant. Okay, I'm done with this article. Thank you for sharing that. It's it's incredible. You should look it. You can watch this. It's um Nick will be sure to um share this thrill. It's incredible. You should watch it, but you know, when we were kids, there was one way to getting fame and glory, and that was be an athlete or maybe a rapper. But now you could be good at whatever you're good at, nerds, and you can still be fame and glory. I wouldn't call them famous. Well, for their people, for their nerd people. You're right. You're right. A lot of nerds are.

SPEAKER_00 16:34

Some people know of them. Look at you, Tyler. Maybe not an Excel competition type of nerd. Still a nerd. I found an article somewhere, I'm sure I was targeted with it, uh, as usual, that gave some great advice for if you're celebrating birthdays around Christmas time. Now, my family, with my side and my husband's side, happens to have four birthdays directly surrounding Christmas. Now add in two of Elliot's best friends, and we have six. You read that right. I mean, you heard that right. Six birthday parties starting the 18th through the 27th. Uh that's fun. So, anyway, I was reading um that one of them. A great way to like make a birthday special. I always feel bad for the kids that have birthdays at Christmas, of course. There's nothing you can do about it, but how do you make it special? And this one little thing was so silly that I'm mad I didn't think of it. But if you have a kid celebrating Christmas, make sure the house is as birthday decored. Um, you know, cover up the Christmas decor, is what I mean. Like, okay, maybe don't hang the stockings that day, take them down. But the best advice was cover the Christmas tree, like put a um balloons on the top of it to cover the star, and then um put streamers all down it. So it kind of looks like a giant cupcake or whatever. Like it's so the tree is like a whole birthday celebration tree, which is a really good idea because it's unreasonable to think you're not going to put up your Christmas decor, but also sad uh that the kids have to like have Christmas decor all around when they're being reminded that their birthday is already shared with the Lord and Savior. So decorate your Christmas tree with balloons and streamers if you have a kid whose birthday falls around the holidays.

SPEAKER_01 18:06

My birthday is on June 28th. So let me just tell you, nailed it. Everybody forgets they got you anything for Christmas. So you are like perfectly six months between stuff. The only thing that was sad was no school birthday parties.

SPEAKER_00 18:18

Yeah, that is. I have a June 1st, which I feel bad because that's like really on the cusp. Like sometimes school used to get out on like June 4th. Now I feel like it's like May 20th. But anyway, um, there you go. That's how you should celebrate your kid. Okay, great.

SPEAKER_01 18:31

Or don't just celebrate your Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and be happy that he gave his life so that we could all live.

SPEAKER_00 18:37

Fala la, we'll be right back. All right, we're back with product rec. We back. These are things that you can get in time for Christmas because it'll be like the week of Christmas by the time you listen to this. So I have two because I can't decide always. One is local, one is not, but both are great for last minute. So uh Historic Milwaukee, which if you are in the southeastern Wisconsin area, Historic Milwaukee has an awesome selection of gifts. Um, this one I'm certain I follow them on Instagram and they talk about them. So they have a whole bunch of like Frank Lloyd Wright products. They have all the neighborhood posters. Um, if you're not familiar with them, like they every neighborhood in Milwaukee has these really cool looking artsy posters. I've always wanted like all of the ones of places I've lived, but my neighborhoods aren't cool. Like the art is not cool on them. So anyway, they have neighborhood posters, they have ornaments, they have all this Frank Lloyd Wright stuff. So check out Historic Milwaukee. Uh, you can pick up if you're in Milwaukee or you can get it shipped too, but it's getting pretty close on the deadline, everybody. TikTok. Um, the other one, I was actually just gifted a gift from here. This is the bomb. Um, I might do it for the teachers. I haven't decided. Teachers are always hard. Um, but there's a website called Loop and Tie. And you, as the giver, um, get to pick an amount, and then the receiver gets an email that says, like, hey, you get to pick your gift. And they click on a link and they have a curated, like, all of these things fall within your price range of whatever, you know, they don't obviously they don't tell you the price, but like I was given a gift and I can pick various, I could pick like um by category. So there's like lifestyle category, there's a kitchen category, there's fashion and beauty, there's socially um conscious. So I could I could donate my gift right to a charity. I could pick a a candle, I could pick a floral vase, whatever. It is awesome, especially like if you don't, you know, if the person has everything or you don't have any idea to get them. It's a simple email, so you can do it on Christmas Eve if you want. Um, so loopandtie.com just discovered this. Um Google uses it, Slack uses it, Microsoft Visa, all kinds of big companies. They have the Lakers. You know, the Lakers. Um, so there's price points starting at $10 up to like $500, includes all the taxes and shipping. And yeah, it's so awesome. I can't believe I've never heard of it.

SPEAKER_01 21:18

Do you know why the Lakers are called the Lakers? I don't. They're originally from Minnesota and were named after the 10,000 Lakers, and they won a bunch of their titles while they're in uh Minnesota. I think it was George Miken was their big player. I love that. That was like dominating. So they're originally from Minnesota and they were called the Lakers, and then they moved to Los Angeles and kept a name. Like sweet. Have you ever thought it's weird that the Utah Jazz were are called the Jazz in Salt Lake City, Utah, where there's no happiness dancing because of the Mormons? I didn't. They're actually from New Orleans originally, so they were the New Orleans Jazz.

SPEAKER_00 21:49

Wow, Nick, full of knowledge. Up to Salt Lake City for free this Christmas. You get Nick's useless facts.

SPEAKER_01 21:56

Anyway, I would like to recommend something that Bridges talked about before. And then Is local candy places. We were running around at uh Grand Geneva Resort and Spa recently and went into the White River gift shop. Oh. And what was there except a huge helping of Anderson's candies? One of our favorites. Yes. Um, we were up at the Brookfield Cown Corners or some such crap. I can't remember what they call. And uh I walked into my friend Julie Waterman's uh newest indulgent chocolateer shop. Uh good job on that opening, Julie. Shout out to you. Uh it was beautiful. They have great chocolates, they were very helpful. I didn't buy anything because we have a bunch of it and you know, whatever. But uh it was it was very nice. They were very nice people there. And uh, you know, there's all sorts of local chocolate places they stock up for this season, uh, because they actually can backstock it to February if they don't sell it now.

SPEAKER_00 22:50

How many at this chocolate-shaped Santa?

SPEAKER_01 22:52

Well, you know, like the bars and stuff. So uh there's probably gonna be all sorts of stuff for you to choose from. So if you just need something, go get chocolate support local. Don't buy the Dove Bar, buy the Indulgence Bar or the Anderson's Candy Bar. There's chocolate everywhere.

SPEAKER_00 23:06

Great advice. We'll be right back. We're back.

SPEAKER_01 23:30

Did you miss us?

SPEAKER_00 23:32

I hope so. Because we've got some funny things to go over right now. Woo! All right, it's the holidays. You know I've been dying for any reason to get in um Hallmark Christmas movie information, but like I was all into moving NBA teams information. Yes, thank you. Um, I'm not gonna do this one because someone read my mind. I sent this to Nick and was like, this is what we were talking about. A week or two ago, we were going to do a Hallmark Christmas movie like Mad Lib thing, but we didn't get our crap together and organize it. And then Matt Surley, who I've talked about on here on uh his Instagram page, he makes charts for things like hilarious. They look, you know, like mathematical and important, but they're always like hilarious topics. Maybe he should uh compete in the Excel Olympics. He should. He wouldn't do great for visually appealing. Yeah. So um he posted, we'll put the link to this so you can laugh at it like us, Hallmark Christmas movie plot generator. And you choose a protagonist, a catalyst, and an outcome, and it is hilarious.

SPEAKER_01 24:31

Oh, can I show you something also hilarious that you're not gonna get entirely, but maybe you'll get it a little bit? Let's see where it is.

SPEAKER_00 24:38

Um well Nick finds that if you've watched one Hallmark Christmas movie, you've watched them all. Um, I was gonna talk about this on a Moose Bouche this week and opted not to, but like every one of them is exactly the same. And exactly the same. So that's what this is saying. Like a widowed vice president enters a Christmas cooking competition and finds a new father for her children. Like it's very funny. Okay, good. What is this?

SPEAKER_01 25:02

So this is um a uh like collection of Hallmark movie posters where it's all the guy in green, the woman in red, all bunch of white people hugging each other in front of like the same background and like making fun of Hallmark movies are all the same, but instead of that, it has Citra Mosaic, Mosaic Citra. Mosaic Citra and Idaho 7. Mosaic and So yeah, I'm not gonna get it because it's made. It's all no, it's all hop names. So they're it's all names of different hop varieties. Oh, really? Yeah, so they're making fun of how like every beer producer in the world is like, we have this amazing new beer, and it's made of mosaic and citra. Which is the same thing. Citra and mosaic. Citra and mosaic with blah blah blah. And it's just like the same beer all the time, but they completely package it a little differently. And call it something different. Very funny.

SPEAKER_00 25:54

I will say, as you showed that image of all the white people, it's funny the new Hallmark movies, because you know they put out new ones every year because you gotta keep it fresh, and literally all you're doing is recycling the exact same plot. The newer ones, like I saw one last night that um had a reference to glamping, and they did these like glamping tents, and it also had a lesbian couple in it. And I was like, whoa, Hallmark movie trying to click get up with the times. Whoa. Like it's 20. I can't, I don't know what what year. Maybe this came out two years ago. I don't know. Either way, I was like, oh, you're really trying here. It had some Asian American actors and actresses like really working on it. So good job. All right, so what we're gonna do today is mad libs. Love it because I love a good mad lib. All right, so stand by because I've now lost all track of my outline. Okay. So, Nick, we're gonna do two of them, I think, if it doesn't take too long. Okay. The first one is I'm gonna give you the theme-ish. Okay. It is Christmas baking. Okay. So I will ask you the words and then I will read them.

SPEAKER_01 26:58

So the butts, did you just say? Well, that's what you do when you're a second grader, you know.

SPEAKER_00 27:03

But okay. I need a noun. Can. Can. All right. Verb ending in ing. Sledding. I thought you were gonna say baking, and I was gonna eh. Um, adjective. Kind. Family member. Sister.

unknown 27:27

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 27:27

I haven't said those two words together in a long time. Hey. Uh verb.

SPEAKER_00 27:33

Run. Ingredient. Nutmeg. Should have been like soy. Um we're gonna pause in the middle of this. Do you try and usually make these make sense or try and make them funny? I try to make them funny, but I'm just like, I don't know, got Christmas on the mic. No, that's fair. Okay, I need a whole bunch of nouns. So one, two, three, four, five of them. Cat. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 27:58

Video game. Great. Swing. Okay. Car. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 28:07

And model. That would have been hard for me. That was a lot of nouns. Now I need a verb. Shoot. Uh I need another noun. We're almost done. Would. Would. I need two numbers. 69. Jesus. And 30. I did try and find adult like mad libs. There not a lot of them exist. My favorite.

SPEAKER_01 28:37

We have numbers at the store, you know, and you could just sense the dread in people's faces as 66.

SPEAKER_00 28:44

66. 67.

SPEAKER_01 28:45

Oh, it's too funny. Every time. That's funny. I've not been around. Every time. Okay. And we had, do you remember Jack, the sweet young man? He always got 69.

SPEAKER_00 28:54

Oh, that's horrible.

SPEAKER_01 28:55

And like he kind of got set up for it sometimes. Oh, buddy. And he's like the sweetest, nicest young man.

SPEAKER_00 29:00

And then they're like, 69? He's like soft-spoken, so kind. Oh, buddy. Okay, and shockingly, the last one we need is a noun.

SPEAKER_01 29:11

Marker.

SPEAKER_00 29:12

Marker. Are you ready? Let's go. Every year we make can at Christmas time. Oh, we make a Christmas can. Sledding has been a tradition since I was a kind kid. Sister used to make most of the recipes back then. I think they wanted a name. Sister used to make most of the recipes back then. But I would always help run nutmeg. I know. Now that I'm older, I make the entire batch of cat from scratch. Meow. All you have to do is mix video game and swing in a bowl until fluffy and add car. Don't forget the bottle. Shoot. Sorry. Shoot them on a wood and bake them at 69 degrees. After 30 minutes, you will have the perfect marker.

SPEAKER_01 30:09

Good. Good, Nick. I failed that one. I mean, you can't fail a madling. It wasn't very good. You got a better one? Sure. I'm not gonna tell you I'll do better.

SPEAKER_00 30:18

I'm not gonna tell you what this one is. Okay. I don't know if that like helps. All right. Adjective. Ugly. I do like how hard you're gonna think about this. Umun. Face. I like where this is going. Uh another noun. But. But. I'm trying to channel out. But. Um adjective.

SPEAKER_01 30:45

Punch. That's not an adjective, that's a verb. Adjective. Um yeah.

SPEAKER_00 30:49

Listen.

SPEAKER_01 30:53

Uh let's see. That'd be a good one.

SPEAKER_00 30:58

Warty. Ooh, I was gonna say sticky. Um, time period. Warty. The dark ages. Oh good, good. Okay, type of relative. You know, like thin. Ooh, good. Adjective. Stinky. Stanky. Ooh. Gonna go well here. No one adjective now. Okay, animal. Honey batter. Honey batter. This one's gonna be good, I can tell. Um, and then I need two more nouns. Um bathtub?

SPEAKER_01 32:12

Good. Okay. And let's see what would be something else. That's a noun. Toy ship.

SPEAKER_00 32:24

Right. Okay, and then the final one is a name of someone in the room, which is really just me. Bridget. Bridget. Okay. Dear Santa. I hope you're having an ugly year. I'm sorry when I hit a face in my sister's butt. Good. It was just a joke. I promise I've been really warty the rest of the dark ages. Can you talk to my can you talk to my in-law and make sure she doesn't give me those stanky footy castle again? I stanky footy was going in a good direction. I really punch wearing them in the Christmas, or excuse me, I really punch wearing them Christmas morning. It's embarrassing. Stop trying to make punch work. Punch doesn't work, Nick. You're not a 12-year-old boy. Could be fetch. Stop. Love that. For Christmas, I want an axe and a barbed nail. But most of all, I want a pet honey badger. Yes. This was good. This is good. But most of all, oh, I'm sorry. I know I'm responsible enough because I do all of my bathtub. That proves it. Plus, I would take him for walks and pick up his toy ship. Please, Santa. Yours truly, Bridget. That one was better. That was better. Good job. Um, mad libs are super fun. I want to do them with Elliot now.

SPEAKER_01 33:48

Prepare for butt, parch, butt, fart, but pimple, but.

SPEAKER_00 33:55

Oh, I don't know if he knows pimple yet. Thank God. Okay, Christmas Mad libs. Print them out. Um, I'm all into like uh curing the Christmas chaos with like minute-to-win-it games. That is chaos, but it's organized because there are rules. So like I think this could be a fun addition to like fun Christmas Day games. That's all.

SPEAKER_01 34:13

Before we get to the most fun part of the segment, eating has been a disaster this week. Yeah, mine's blank.

SPEAKER_00 34:19

My outline is blank.

SPEAKER_01 34:20

But you know what's delicious during Christmas time? Beer. Beer. I love Christmas beer. It's my favorite thing of the year. Uh we were up. The reason why I was up by indulgence was I went to Cafe Hollander, which Bridget has choice words to say. Uh anyway, they are a huge Belgian Christmas beer place, which is my favorite. And me and my friend Kyle, my friend Kyle and I, we went and had a number of Belgian Christmas beers. Uh, we got an email afterwards from our credit card company saying, Did you tip 431%?

SPEAKER_00 34:55

Come on.

SPEAKER_01 34:55

And it appears that they, you know that you did? The tip and the amount were flipped, like the total was right. Oh. And I'm like, I don't care. My dad's like, no, they need to know that they did. I'm like, it's Christmas. Did you tip 400? Let the girl inflate her tips. Oh, that's cute of you. I just I love Christmas beer. If you haven't had it, see if you can find someone. It's hard to find, it's not very popular.

SPEAKER_00 35:20

I haven't, but your piss your picture looked really lovely. Thank you. It was very festive.

SPEAKER_01 35:24

So I just I love I love Christmas beer.

SPEAKER_00 35:26

So that's what Nick was eating this week, which is more than me, which was my calories. I've been roasting a lot of broccoli, which is really boring, but it's really good. Well, that's you know, no food for me. Time for Kid Garner, which will, you know, you'll understand I've mostly been eating cookies.

SPEAKER_01 35:43

Fala la la la. We have uh our Christmas tree has a little foot switch to turn it on and off, which is fabulous. It also is LED, so it can be white, it can be multicolored, it can be switching between the two, it can be blinking, it can be seizure-inducing. Yeah, it can be anything you want. I hate blinking Christmas lights. Oh, yeah, they're the worst. Yeah. Uh and anyway, Simona has now decided that it's her responsibility to turn it on and off. So every morning she runs out, usually, you know, in some state of undress, and hope you can hear the stomping of the foot, and like double clicks it, doesn't click it, misses it, gets very frustrated, finally gets it, goes. What what is her color of choice? So she knows, so we do uh Sarah's a white Christmas light person, and I am a colored Christmas light person. That sounds right. So we we have to compromise where at night it can be uh white and in the morning it can be colored. And so Simona knows the colors. So she gets kind of mad if they're the incorrect colors. Oh, good job, girl. So she points out which which color it should be at which time and changes it to the appropriate colors and makes sure we keep our marital peace.

SPEAKER_00 37:00

Oh, good job, Simona.

SPEAKER_01 37:01

Staying together because of our daughter.

SPEAKER_00 37:02

That's your job, your whole life. JK, JK.

SPEAKER_01 37:06

Anyway, uh, it's just really cute. I love how into the tree she is, and she's you know, she's good at it.

SPEAKER_00 37:11

I did notice that your tree has no ornaments on the bottom foot and a half of it. Well, I think you told me to do that. I don't do that at my house. Oh, yeah. Shannon does that, I think.

SPEAKER_01 37:20

Simona definitely lays underneath it like a cat and bats at the ornaments.

SPEAKER_00 37:24

Oh, that's funny. So I'm mean and yell at my kids. I'm like, no touching these. Um, okay, I have two because I have two kids and it's Christmas, so I'm giving you two. Christmas is all around us. Come on and let it snow. Um, the first thing is not as funny as the second, but it is about Elliot. He came home from school. They must have read or studied or been read, whatever, the gingerbread man. And he had to make a gingerbread man cookie, like had to. I'm like, okay, we have had some dough made because I have a um family sugar cookie dough recipe that like it takes forever to make. So whatever. We have some in the fridge. Um, and we don't have, we have like a hundred Christmas Christmas cookie cutters. No gingerbread man. Oh no. So I had to cut one out. I used our butcher paper, which was of great use because of the back. That's smart, yeah. Um, hand drew a gingerbread man, you know, gingerbread person, hand cut it. Well, that I just made one because I was like, Lucy doesn't care. Let's just like be done with this. Elliot's asking about it. Um, I broke its legs off. So uh Elliot's like, Elliot came in like, is my gingerbread band done? And I'm like, I'm really sorry. So I remade two more, okay?

SPEAKER_01 38:30

Well, just because his legs are broke off doesn't make him any less of a gingerbread man.

unknown 38:35

True.

SPEAKER_00 38:36

True.

SPEAKER_01 38:36

You could have taught him a lesson in inclusion, Bridget.

SPEAKER_00 38:39

I decorated the failure. It was. He wanted to decorate this cookie and never eat it. He like wants it to be his best friend. So we decorated together, and I love decorating with a kid because my cookie looks just as bad as the kids. So I sent it to my family group text. Look what we made. And my sister said that my gingerbread person looked just like the one on Trek. So I did a side. That's what I was actually thinking of. It does. It's like the same. So anyway, it was just a funny thing. We have a ginger, like the most terrifying gingerbread person that Elliot um made that I'm like, uh it's still sitting on the plate. I don't know what to do with it because he doesn't want it ever to be eaten. So the next thing.

SPEAKER_01 39:16

Put it in um, like uh uh what's the stuff you you know put your deck in? Uh epoxy. Oh, like epoxy it. I shut epoxy. No, I'm serious.

SPEAKER_00 39:25

Merry Christmas!

SPEAKER_01 39:26

Well, people have you seen how people like put Big Macs in epoxy and like preserve them that way and it's like an art project? No, what? It works really well. You should epoxy it. My dad has epoxy, maybe I will. Oh, so your dad could do it for a Christmas gift forever.

SPEAKER_00 39:38

That's a great idea. Ah, you can get it in time for Christmas. More gift ideas. Um, okay, if your children are listening, stop. Don't let them listen anymore. Um, okay, now you've had enough time to turn it off. We I have brought my kids for one. Are you getting a puppy for them? No, but it is about the puppy. So last weekend we saw like eight Santas. We just like, I don't know, we went to a couple different Christmas events, we saw a whole bunch. They were really good Santas. Well, Elliot added a puppy to his Christmas list at some point, which was like, that's that's mom panic inducing right there. And so he had told Santa that. And this very, very good Santa was like, I don't carry puppies on my sleigh because they could jump out. I don't take live animals, whatever. Whatever story he said about live animals not going on the sleigh, Elliot believed. And he goes, They need a union, like they need a Santa union of like these are the pro tip. So there is like a class. I happen to know this Santa, and um he's like he took he's taken a class. There's a class. Good. So anyway, so then uh a week later or a couple days, whatever, we see a different Santa. And now Elliot's like, I'm not telling him I want a puppy because he can't take it on a sleigh. I'm like, you're right. So they go. Lucy usually just like sits by Elliot with Santa but doesn't really talk. Well, this time Lucy had tons of things to say. And what did Lucy ask for? A horse. And this Santa didn't know the line about live animals. So I was like, no, you can't take live animals. I had to like jump in and not that Lucy knows, but you could see Elliot on his face being like, but you can't take live animals. But you know, so I think I saved it. Hopefully I saved it. But if you're a Santa Claus out there, tell the story about live animals not being on the sleigh. Pa la la.

SPEAKER_01 41:16

I think Lucy deserves a horse.

SPEAKER_00 41:18

Oh my god. I was like, what that's the only thing she's asked for. Like, she doesn't know to ask for things yet, but but a horse, yes. She is getting a plastic a horse of sorts. It's not real.

SPEAKER_01 41:33

Merry Christmas, Nick. Merry Christmas, Bridget. Uh, to all of you out there, I hope you're not entirely panicked. I have to go panic. We're all panicking. Tis the season. You can, you know, follow us on the social medias. You can check out my Blazor on YouTube. Do all the things. Give us a five-star review on whatever you listen to as a Christmas present to us.

SPEAKER_00 41:54

Thanks so much. I hope you don't stress out too much this week and listen in for a special little hello from us next week.

SPEAKER_01 42:01

Bridget's address is 355 West Broad Street, Lake Cheney, Wisconsin, 53147. All the puppies can be delivered there.

SPEAKER_00 42:11

Have a great week.